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A dad claims he was ‘forced’ into parenthood after a woman he was seeing casually told him she was pregnant…

A man has taken to popular parenting forum Mumsnet to ask if he is being unreasonable to feel ‘forced’ into parenthood.

The man says he had been seeing a woman casually for three to four months and believed she was using contraception but was shocked when she announced she was pregnant and expected to resume their relationship.

A Big Shock

The man says he is already the father of a three-year-old girl, who he fought to have 50/50 custody of, but is being constantly chased for child support and told to take responsibility for this new baby.

“I felt betrayed, used and tricked into something I never wanted and to that point I was clear about,” he wrote.

“I made it clear that I wanted nothing to do with it now or in the future and she decided to go ahead.”

The reluctant father says he feels pressure to be involved in his child’s life.

“Why should I be responsible for something which I was effectively tricked into and something I then had no control over?” he asked the forum.

It Takes Two

Comments on the dad’s post were critical of his willingness to blame his former partner for the pregnancy.

“It is not the child’s fault that its parents were a bit slapdash with contraception and you need to take some responsibility for that,” one forum user wrote.

“Nobody has forced you into anything that you weren’t aware could happen.”

“Accidents happen,” said another.

“Why should we have to bear the full cost and responsibility, just by virtue of our biology?”

This dad didn’t exactly get the support he was looking for! We can only hope that this baby is able to be brought up in a loving environment without this sort of tension.

Do you think this Dad should take responsibility or does he have a point? Share your thoughts in the comments.

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  • Excuse me…… you do know how babies are made right? If you 100% dont want kids then always use a condom. Take responsibility and make sure you use a condom 100% of the time. Dont leave that responsibility to someone else. Or go and get the snip if condoms are just way to hard for you to use.

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  • They are both to blame I guess. But I mean what was he supposed to do – watch her take the pill every day. You expect people to tell the truth in these matters

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  • I feel sad for the child. It was wrong of this woman to lie to him but he would have also been using protection if he didn’t want a child that badly.

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  • Wow that is a shocker, I can’t believe I am reading this. It is definitely a choice, no one forces you to do anything.

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  • This is disgusting. Children do not decide to be born. We as adults make a choice to have sex, not be careful, and then bang your pregnant and the poor child is coming into this shitty world where it’s parents don’t want it! Grow up, deal with it, it takes two,

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  • Use a condom!!

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  • You were happy to stick it in without protection and you should never just assume a woman is taking birth control. If you felt that strongly about it you could have 1) refrained and kept it in your pants or 2) don’t raw dog it.

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  • It takes two to make a baby. He was happy enough to do the practical, and whether or not he still wants a relationship with the lady, he has a duty of care to pay towards the cost of the child

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  • Both people involved are equally as responsible for contraception.
    If he had to continually make a point to her saying he doesn’t want to have kids then that should have been a sign for him to take much more precaution than what he did.
    He obviously knows how babies are made.
    In saying that, since he did make it known that he didn’t want to have a baby I do think he now has this forced pressure of responsibility.
    Anything can happen in 9 months, he could come to terms and be prepared and excited.
    I hope they do the right thing by that baby.

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  • Aw poor dad, he couldn’t do anything about it lol ! He could have used a condom, get a vasectomy or keep his penis in his pants

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  • Sorry but if you don’t want children you also need to be a responsible guy. My husband had this opinion when we first started going out and made sure he always used protection until we got married. It was quite refreshing actually that he was such a grown up about it seeing as we were only 18 at the time.

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  • Man up and take responsibility, the child is not at fault and accidents happen, the pill isn’t 100% no contraception is so he seriously needs to step up!

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  • Yeah it definitely takes two, I don’t know why people don’t use condoms if they don’t a baby? So irresponsible especially if you don’t seem to care about your partner that much.

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  • If it was a casual relationship. why not wear condoms? Without protection he was risking a pregnancy, or an STI.

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  • Baby was meant to be, this is life and what can happen even if you are casually seeing someone.

    Reply

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