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Brad Kearns from DaDMuM first went viral when he shared what it is like to be the mum. “You know when your wife always says “I wish I could be the dad” and you’re like … It’s the same thing…”

Brad was thrown into the world of DaDMuM life when his wife was laid up in hospital and he was left in charge of the kids.  He soon realised he would much rather be the dad.

Brad has shared a few posts since, and one thing he has noticed is the “perfect parent army” who always have to slam someone.

What Brad wants to remind everyone is that “nothing these people can say will change how I am going to live or parent. And it shouldn’t change your opinions of what you’re doing either.”

He writes…

DaDMuM 8.0 – “The Perfect Parent Army”

Today I wanted to talk about the most annoying organisation on earth. It’s the organisation where membership is in the masses and it comes at the very low price of “socially awkward”, “Facebook reject” and “I am a great parent because I tell myself I am”

I would like to shed some light on what I will now be referring to as The PPA. Yes my friends this is the Perfect Parent Army. They are all around us. They are everywhere. I once saw a David Attenborough special on them…”aaaah and here is the Perfect Parent, it looks smells and sounds like the other parents, however when placed in a social environment it’s shit will no longer stink and it will begin ignoring its young in order to watch how the others raise their young. As soon as its young is old enough to leave the nest, it will likely disassociate itself from the family as a means of finding social acceptance and experiencing life” Okay so that was a bit extreme…. But you get my drift right?

Have you ever had a moment when you may have shared, or over-shared an experience as a parent? Or a moment where you may have been in a crappy situation where you had to do something out of the ordinary with the kids … Chances are you were minding your own business and getting on with your life when someone decided to stick their nose in. And in that moment you questioned your parenting actions for the first time?

Well you my friend have encountered a member of the PPA. These are the people who lurk in the bowels of social media, commenting on 3 day old posts and replying by tagging your name, they are over represented in the P&C committee in schools and sporting clubs, probably ignored by their partners so choose to live vicariously through their children and spotless homes. These are the people who will judge you for running bare-foot into Coles at 7pm with a toddler and who shun most brands of baby products because of their firm beliefs in diet, health and safety for children. Yet are somehow the same people who will tell you it’s ludicrous to spend decent money on a pram because they raised 10 of their kids in a K-Mart special.

There is no economical link to this condition however clear links have been made between the parents membership in the PPA and their own insecurities as parents.

Well nevertheless, these are the people who will keep the rest of us honest. Because as they so often tell us, they have a wealth of experience and have all of their shit sorted which is why they have time to pry into the lives of those who are having a go. Well recently, if you have been reading a few of my posts you will see that I have been getting slammed by some of these “Perfect Parents”. And to that I say ‘bring it’. Because nothing these people can say will change how I am going to live or parent. And it shouldn’t change your opinions of what you’re doing either.

Because you’re doing pretty damn good to me! Let them watch from their ivory towers while we ride the wave of shit, vomit and floors that could do with another vacuuming!  #parentyourownkids”

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  • Something I learnt early on was to keep all my thoughts on others parenting style and childs behaviour to myself. If you dare to comment on the behaviour of someone elses child then sure as eggs your little angel will start doing the exact thing that you thought to comment on. it will happen within weeks.

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  • This guy hit the nail on the head. I’ve not heard of their blog/site before, hopenits all still up and running so I can find it!

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  • Lol, so true !

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  • These ‘perfect parents’ I am sure have a lot of hidden insecurities. I just think we need to do the best we can and that is enough.

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  • I agree with Jazbright – different personality styles aren’t just limited to social media, they are everywhere and if you allow yourself to give the more negative ones the opportunity to engage in battle with you or impact upon your life by not ignoring them, then you are giving them more fuel and ammunition and ultimately only allowing their negativity into your life by engaging in battle with them.

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  • Follow your own instincts and don’t worry what others are doing.

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  • lol, yep he nailed that one! –

    so very true and I love that as a dad he now sees what a lot of mum’s have to put up with :)

    Thanks for writing the article :)

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  • isn’t this the same thing in reverse? no matter what you’re doing & where you are there’s always going to be a lot of personalities, it’s great you’re passionate about being a parent, love it and live it, don’t worry so much what the Joneses are saying or doing.

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  • If you didn’t post on social media then their wouldn’t be any PPA. There never was years ago.

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  • He sounds like a twerp to me, but that’s his personality, not his parenting skills.

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  • I like the comment about the Kmart special pram. They won’t admit that the average really cheap pram doesn’t have as much support for your baby’s back as it should. Neither does their strollers – they are even worse. Their legs if they are long enough bend at the knees and are in no man’s land until their feet reach the foot rest. In short summer clothes their legs rub against the front edge of the seat and can “rub” quite badly. “dirt” cheap can be false economy. I know of 2 children who with that type of stroller was used for had back problems by the age of 10.
    I doubt the condition of it after 2 children if it’s used for any length of time and often.

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  • I wondered how Brad was going well said

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  • Interesting. I don’t like the way this dad comes across as self-righteous, rather than funny.

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  • Brad you are honest and real and tell it like it is!

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  • There is no such thing as a perfect parent.

    Reply

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