I have a toddler who is 4 in a few months. Since January this year, I went from having a child who went to bed at a reasonable time and slept in his bed till 7/8am, he also listened to an extent and was a lot easier to handle. Now, I have a child who will make any excuse not to go to bed, which means we are usually up until midnight still telling him he needs to go to bed, and he just refuses to listen no matter what the consequence. Not to mention, once he is asleep, at whatever time, he wakes within 2 hours and then every hour after that, trying to get into my bed, which I refuse to allow because that definitely means an even worse sleep for me.
I read my child a book every night before bed, because that’s what I love and he enjoys it to.
I always send my son back to his bed, and I have tried, sitting in his room, closing the door, no communication and tucking back in, allowing him to sleep on the floor in his room, I am at my wits end, not only that but I am sure 4-6 hours of sleep a night for my almost 4 year old who won’t nap during the day is not good, and for me, who also has a 1 year old during the day (who sleeps perfectly) I am absolutely exhausted and getting extremely depressed. It also does not help that he will not listen to me during the day, to the point where I ask at least 5 times before going crazy, and then he starts to smile and give me a nasty look as to say “haha, got you right where I want you”, I do not like to leave my house with him because I cannot control him, and I don’t lose it in public because I don’t think anyone should have to witness my son behaving so terribly that his mother needs to put on an even bigger show. At home, I have tried, sending him to his room for a set amount of time (mostly to calm me down), making him sit on a chair until he can tell me what he thinks he has done wrong, I have tried just ignoring him, doesn’t work, and every time I do talk to him, I get down to his level and make eye contact (once he poked at my eyes).
I have seeked help with my local health professional through a service called Kaleidoscope, I have called countless “experts” and they have told me I have tried all that they would advise. I am also sick of being told, “he is just a kid, kids will be kids and he will grow out of it eventually, you just have to ride it out”, I have been dealing with this for 11 months, whilst breastfeeding and trying to be a stay at home mum with two kids.
I am tired, and my partner tries to help as best as he can but even he doesn’t know what we can do.
I would rather not get up in the morning because I just wake up and then instantly am in a bad mood and just want to go to sleep.
I have had breaks to have “me” time, but once that time is over, I am back to square one.
Please tell me I am not the only one, and that there is a reason…. because I feel like everybody thinks I am just a bad mother who needs to get over it.
And, I don’t hit (smack or whatever), because I do not believe it to be an effective method and I don’t like the idea of teaching my children that hitting is okay if you think someone is being naughty.
Posted by momEL92, 11th November 2014