13 Answers

I always assumed I would return to work once my youngest started school. This is still several years away but the close I get to that time, the less ideal it seems. Financially we can afford for me to continue to stay at home, we budget and are frugal, however extra income would also allow us to do more too. I still want to be at home with the children before & after school, but also on the holidays. My career has been on hold for many years already and I do worry I’ll struggle to go back to the professional working world. Mums who have continued to stay at home while their kids are in school, is this something you’d encourage? Are there reasons you’d change your circumstances if you could? The mums who have returned to work now the kids are in school, do you have any regrets? Would you go back to being a SAHM if you could?

Posted anonymously, 9th September 2019

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  • I guess it would depend on what work you’re going back to and if you could work the hours around school time, or whether you would need before and after school care? Also did you love your job? and do you actually “want” to go back to it? The school day goes really fast. You drop them off then five minutes later it feels like its time to pick them up lol. I still have one at home but there’s so much to do during the day that even when she goes to school I don’t think I’ll want to go back to work, at least not full time anyway.

  • Once my daughter started school I intended to go back to work but then my parents became ill and I spent those school hours looking after them for many years. Everyone’s circumstances are different and you should never compare yourself to others or feel guilty. Do what is practical and what makes you and your family happy. (•◡•)

  • Ive never been a SAHM and probably never will be.

  • I went back one day a week after my twins started school. I have now returned back to my own business 4 days a week as I felt ‘guilty’ that I was at home doing “nothing”, which is the biggest joke. I have still so much to do and so much to catch up on, that I really can’t afford the time to be working in my own business, which is not from home. I seem to be rushing from school drop off, to work, to school pickup, home and then doing all the mum jobs, it really has just stressed me out even further!
    If you can afford it, I would recommend being a SAHM as long as possible, your kids need the best you, and they are only young once.

  • Regret is never useful and I always look at the pros and cons in any situation, evaluate and then make a decision and put it into action.

  • My original answer disappeared! I hope this answer sticks!
    I have a good balance of both and this has always worked for me.

  • I think it all depends on your family circumstances. I didn’t go back to work. We have 4 kids; 2 biological children and 2 foster children under a permanent guardianship order.
    My youngest has Down Syndrome and I have to be available to go to therapies and medical appointments with her during school times (outside school hours gives problems with my other children) and also for my 9yr old we see psychologist, peadiatrician and psychiatrist during school hours.
    We moved from Sydney to Brisbane in July and my 5yr old went from full time attending Kindy in Sydney, to only attending 1,5 hour Prep here in Brisbane (facing lots of resistance to get her enrolled in a mainstream school) ! You may understand I’m glad I don’t work

  • I came back to work once my son went into day care as we couldn’t afford to live off one wage, but I only went back 2 days a week and then when he joined his sister at school I couldn’t really justify me not working (although I would have loved to) I went back 3 days hours wise – but spread across 4 days. I luckily work not far from where we live and I have very flexible, accommodating bosses which allows me to do school drop offs and swap days for important school events. I love being home for them 3 afternoons a week and can still do the after school activities. If we could have afforded it ideally I would work 3 x school hour days but we needed the money and this currently works for us. Everyone is so different so you have to do what works best for you and your family

  • I have always enjoyed a well rounded balance of both and this has worked effectively.

  • I think that it is totally an individual choice and everyone is different. I believe you just have to do what is right for you and that is something that can constantly change. You are very blessed if you are one of the few who get to chose to go back to work. I feel sorry for those who get no choice at all, and have to go back before they are ready.

  • I had written here yesterday but my answer disappeared. Strange…
    Well, doesn’t matter, I love being a stay-at-home mum. It gives security to my daughter and makes family life a lot easier. I wouldn’t change it for the world. :-)

  • I did go back to work after my older children were at school, it was hard but had to be done to get us out of trouble. Then number four came along, things were different and I stayed home with her until she was seven. I had another go going back to work but found it harder this time as my skills we not as a good as needed. Found some work to do from home, a hobby turning some money. Another surprise of twins this time and no even with one who took a while to settle I am staying home this time. Still doing craft work for extra money and my sanity.
    The things you have to ask is staying home going to be enough for you, will you find something that will suit the hours you want to work. Make a list of both sides and then see if one side is better then the other.

  • I love to have the possibility to stay at home. When my daughter was young, I wouldn’t have wanted it any different. Staying at home allowed me to follow every single step of my daughter’s development, taking care of the house without having to pay someone else to do it, allowed my husband to enjoy his time at home relaxing and engaging with our daughter, having a life less stressful than families where they both work and they have to run all the time to fit everything. Our daughter is now 17 and it gives her stability knowing that I am always here for her.
    We don’t live an expensive life, we go on holiday just once a year, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. :-)

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