245 Answers

Breastfeeding advice for attending a wedding – My cousin is getting married next year in April and we just received the “Save the Date” cards. It was addressed to just my husband and I so I checked with the bride to be about whether kids were invited. They aren’t… and I’m totally fine with this for my two and a half year old – she will stay with friends. But just to clarify with her, I reminded her that I would have a two month old baby (who I intend to breast feed) by this time and was told that this child wouldn’t be able to come either. The wedding will be two hours from home, so even if I was considering leaving the baby for a few hours at a time with friends and returning to feed as needed, this is not an option since I will not be close by. I was told later by my aunt that she as the mother of the groom is mortified and spoke to the bride to be about it and was told that it is our choice not to attend the wedding…. How would other people handle it? Would you just let it go and suck it up? Write a letter to the cousin explaining the physical impossibility and disappointment at not being able to share the day with them? Hire a baby sitter for 12 hours and a close motel room that I can go to for feeding? (the thought of that TERRIFIES me! – where do you even look to hire somebody for that?

Posted by anon, 28/10/13

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  • Could you express some breast milk? Other then that, just not attend the wedding

  • I have been in a similar situation, we ended up not going after bring told that our baby – also 8 weeks wasn’t welcome and if I wanted to feed would need to find somewhere else. Saved on a wedding present and babysitter that night. Also shows what some people are like. The bride is now pregnant and I wonder if it will change her opinion.s

  • We had a girlfriend in a booked room at the reception venue with our bub… It was handy, and I got to relax

  • well if she won’t change her mind, consider not going. some hotels will offer babysitting where they come to your room and watch the children there. there might be a minimum age restriction though. it is all up to the individual hotel.

    reassure the couple that you won’t be letting the child disrupt the service. this lady does seem very stubborn. maybe you just have to celebrate or spend some time with them before the wedding and either celebrate it then or use it as an opportunity to show them how well the baby sleeps etc and therefore won’t be a problem. The bride probably hasn’t had experience with children and therefore is only picking up on the horror stories

  • there are some good comments here

  • That’s very unreasonable from her, Bridezilla much?

  • if you cant leave the baby then dont go

  • you cant leave your baby i guess i wouldnt go

  • I honestly would write a letter as this is just totally impractical. I’m actually quite shocked that someone has not even allowed a 2 month old to a wedding. I mean how much disruption can a 2 month old do? Maybe the bride is worried that children would take the attention away from HER. I think she is being totally selfish putting these sorts of demands on you and we can only hope that one day she is in the same predicament and is made to decide like you have to. But then again she may be one of those mums that think the whole breastfeeding thing is yucky!!

  • I got married in March last year and we requested no children at the reception but kids were more than welcome to come to the ceremony. We had a couple of friends with young babies and I said to them that they were welcome to bring them along to the reception also, one chose not to bring their kids at all and the other declined coming to the reception but came to the ceremony. Maybe you could just go to the ceremony and skip the reception if she won’t budge on her decision? It’s a hard choice but you have to do what’s best for you and your baby – good luck in your decision :)

  • You have to do what is most comfortable for you.

  • i hope all goes well

  • Curious to know how this worked out – did you go to the wedding?

  • Has and advice put you at ease?

  • Are you going to the wedding?

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