7 Answers

So my 12 mth old son will not sleep in his own cot in his bedroom. It is becoming a nightly struggle to get him to sleep. He has about a one-hour nap during the day and sometimes an afternoon nap of about 30 mins. The only place he seems to want to sleep is in bed with hubby & I.

I have tried numerous things to try and make him comfortable in his own room again and now nothing seems to be working. I have tried a pillow pet projector light, soft lullabies playing in the room (this used to work every night a few months back) singing to him myself next to cot. I’ve tried getting asleep in my arms after night bottle and then carefully transferring him into cot but he just wakes up straight away and realises I’m not holding him anymore and starts screaming. I’ve tried the whole letting him cry, which usually ends up with him vomiting on himself from getting so worked up. Or he has got so worked up that I am worried to let him cry any longer.  All of this usually ends in us bringing him in our bed where he has no problem at all falling asleep straight away.

I have had enough and as much as I love snuggling with him every night he must start sleeping in his room. This is my 3rd child and I have never experienced this with my girls as they were sleeping fine on their own since birth. Any advice would be appreciated.


Posted by nat85, 22nd July 2014

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  • Could you get him a big persons bed so you can lay with him in his room for a while at bed time?

  • save our sleep the book saved us :) goodluck x

  • Haven’t experienced this so simply suggestions – could you try bottle in cot and then gently pay his head or back until he is asleep? I know it will probably be exhausting but if it works the long run results will be worth it. Good luck :)

  • I know it’s hard but the control crying worked with all three of my kids. You let them cry for 5 minutes then go in give them a quick cuddle again then tuck them back in. You can continue doing this then making the time between coming in longer and longer. It is tough – I hated hearing my kids cry but it worked.

  • Try a bedtime routine that lets him feel in control… a new plush toy he can chose that has to stay in his room and if all else fails move your mattress into his floor until he gets used to being in his bed then slowly transition it out? Or a sleep school, there are a lot of good ones around.

  • Watch super nanny she has some ggreat methods to try :) also watching another child do it helps ease the pain your feeling when you realize your not alone

  • I would try Save Our Sleep. We did it with our eldest when he was one and we’ve never looked back. We then started our next tow babies on it from birth. It is difficult but I say I’d rather 3-4 hard days and nights now rather than the next 3-4 years of sleep issues. Sleep is so severely under rated for both parents and children. It is vital to both our health and wellbeing. The book is fantastic but you can also sign up for online support which I’d strongly recommend. Good luck!

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