We care for our grandson, now 4.  I’m worried because he doesn’t listen to anyone and he’s getting worse. We’ve tried all sorts of ways to get him to understand. If we are out shopping he does naughty things, then he won’t listen when asked to stop what he’s doing. Sometimes he runs on the road and won’t stop which is dangerous. If he won’t listen now, what’s he going to be when he is older? Any suggestion please?


Posted by deborah_osborne, 19th August 2014


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  • I’ve heard of a mum who wrote an article who did an amazing thing. “Follow through” ie if her child didn’t listen in shops. She’d give one warning then they really did leave kart and go home! So if your grandson won’t hold your hand to cross road then you turn around and go home. I know it sounds a lot of effort but that’s what it’s all about. Children know we bluff a lot. Seven warnings, no consequences. If mum or grandad is serious about going home or not having the treat then their actions will change.



  • He is not too young to learn about consequences. Mine started with that kind of behaviour. I picked an occasion she was looking forward to, and explained a reoccurence of that behaviour would mean not going to the event.. she did so we didn’t. She learnt that misbehavior meant missed treats and is (generally ) well behaved now.



  • I think it is probably age related too it’s no longer the terrible two’s its more like the three’s or fours.



  • He’s at pre school ,they have issues with him also .I’m going to be more firmer ,but don’t want to be too hard .Try keeping a routine,.Thanks



  • I agree with what Taynik has said. These methods have worked for me.



  • Sounds like he’s really testing you and your limits. Kids need to know how far they can go. Easy to say but you have to be firm in your decisions with him. No means no etc. All the best.



  • Appreciate all your good answers,We are asking his Pediatrician next appointment .He’s not bad boy but goes too far &doesn’t listen .



  • I think you may need to start being a little tougher on your grandson and maybe taking toys away or using a naughty chair.
    good luck i hope you can nip this problem before it gets really bad.



  • I think you need to start being a little tougher on your grandson. Holding his hand at all times and taking things off him when he is not listening. If your grandson goes to kinder or daycare I would also suggest you speak to his carers/teacher and see what they do when this behaviour happens



  • If he is not listening then I’m afraid you need to try a different tact. My daughter when she doesn’t listen we grab her arm (not so it hurts) but so we startle her and get her attention and focus otherwise I could be telling her things until the cows come home and she wouldn’t listen. Teachers at schools use sayings like ” 1,2,3 Eyes on me” and the children in prep (so ages 5/6) have to repeat it and look at the teacher. In grade 1 they use the same principle but my daughters teacher claps a rhythm and the kids have to repeat it. I also second the other comment that the SuperNanny has some wonderful age appropriate techniques, find the route of the problem and then you can apply the solution :) Good luck



  • You need to set clear boundaries. I’ve found the Supernanny series to be really helpful with age appropriate punishment.



  • Does he go to preschool at all? You need to find out what they tell him and use that. I’m straight up with my daughter and she knows if shes naughty she loses something.. Ie a toy, iPad, no tv , not going to a party, me calling Santa .. You have to try all technics till you find out what works on him.good luck


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