25 Answers

I need some help I’m trying to convince my partner to have another baby. Our son is now 20 months and by the time I fall pregnant and have a baby he will be at least 3- I really am ready and am very clucky, I’ve tried to talk to him but he gets mad every time I bring it up. I’ve cried and that doesn’t seem to faze him… I’ve tried the whole we can’t have sex now in case we fall pregnant but I don’t know how to get him to realise time is ticking!! And I don’t wanna be having baby’s my whole life I wanna get it out of the way.

Posted by beckkz, 5th February 2014

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  • I noticed that this question was posed quite some time ago. Did you end up having another child? Very hard to convince a partner to have another child. Definitely keep having sex, like others have said he knows that pregnancy can result from sex then don’t hold back.

  • Why is there a rush to have all your babies at once? The main pressure seems to be that you want to ‘get it over with’ and ‘not spend all your life having babies’.. so does that mean he does want some more but just needs time to adjust to the very real legal obligations to be financially responsible for the child? Or does that mean he doesn’t want anymore fullstop. I think that is one issue to sort out, and then maybe you can have some counseling to help you work through why you feel so rushed to ‘get it out the way’.

  • Be careful about forcing a baby on your partner if he doesn’t want another one as this can impact on your relationship. I would encourage open and calm dialogue to understand why he doesn’t want another child and will allow you to explain why you would like one. Hopefully you can come to an agreement.

  • Don’t hold back on the sex for fear of pregnancy. If you are not on contraception then he knows exactly what could happen when having sex. Intimacy may also have him feeling different. Good luck and I hope you get the baby you long for

  • I don’t think that you should ‘convince’ 2 anyone to have a baby. I assume that he is a hands on dad. So the decision made will affect him in the every day practical sense, but financially and emotionally. Sit down and have a serious discussion on what works for your marriage.

  • I hope you have your baby and that you are both thrilled!

  • I hope it got better… this is hard because although you shouldn’t force him but he is forcing too…sigh

  • there are some good comments here

  • i think if you keep pushing it on him you might push him away i dont think his ready for another one and i think he gets mad at you because he doesnt wanna hurt you by saying now, just lay of him a bit and he may want one later on.

  • This is a tough one. If you aren’t on the same page at the start it could only make things harder later on. If you ‘accidentally’ fall pregnant he may resent you for it which will only make things worse. Perhaps try different ways to talk to him to find out what’s really going on. Good luck and i hope you get the outcome you are hoping for!

  • Such a hard one. I would find a quiet time to sit down and openly discuss the reasons why he is against and your reason for wanting another child sooner rather than later. It is difficult and can cause much emotion and I have been there so I get how you feel. It is very difficult because it has to be mutual want otherwise it can cause resentment down the track. Best of luck.

  • You know what you need to discuss the sensibly like an adult, he may have reasons he doesn’t want another child and you need to stop the emotional blackmail. You both need to be ready to make a success of raising children and it could cause problems in your relationship if you force the issue, enjoy your life!

  • Try to find a little time to sit and talk with him, and find out why he does not want another one. Is it the space is not there, or the money is not there, or does he fel jealous of the time you have already spent with the first one. There surely is a reason… does he think he will not be able to cope with wages, or even time, and be a good father…

  • What a tough one, you need to talk this out completely, find out all the reason he is against and tell him all the reasons you are for, hopefully you will find the answer you are looking for

  • I think you need to ask him calmly why he is against another child but no matter what his answer you will just have to respect it. I take you discussed children before you had child number one and discussed how many you would both like?? Has He changed his mind or did you? If He has changed his mind then you need to point out to him that it is not fair to do that. If you have changed your mind then you are not being fair to your partner and if you didnt discuss this at all before having children then you are in a very tough spot indeed.
    I dont think its a good idea to try and convince someone to have a child…if he gives in to your tears and you have a child that he didnt really want in the first place is that really fair to him and to the child?
    I know how strong these feelings are…I was the same..I had one child and my husband said he didnt want anymore and this was after discussing everything before we got married and me clearly telling him i loved kids and wanted 6. Its not fair to change your mind part way through.

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