7 Answers

My 11,8 and 6 year old kids have a couple chores they need to do each day. Make their beds, clear their dishes from the table after each meal,put the dirty clothes in washing machine.But I have to nag, nag, nag to get them to do every task. I’m tired of hearing myself and I know it’s getting worse! But I don’t know what else to do.I really need help them create a habit.Can you give me some other ideas? We’re stuck in a terrible cycle now.

Posted by shanika, 30th June 2020

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  • Kids are all different. My son (now 15yrs old) always has been excellent in doing his chores and tidying up after himself, his room is always need too. My 17yr old and 11 yr old daughter are not as organised and require more prompting. My 11 yr old has a disorder and frequently needs a little help or supervision to do what is asked. We’ve done reward charts in the past, with little effect in her case. My youngest has Down syndrome, needs prompting but in general loves to help.
    When my kids were younger we had the rule -no dinner on the table till it’s tidy- which worked. Then after dinner -no tv on/ play time till dishes are off the dinner table.
    Reminders are given in a neutral tone, praising when they do their jobs with warmth and hi-fives !

  • 2 things we do, which are in no way perfect and I still get frustrated with our 5 kidlets.
    1. If I walk passed and notice something isn’t done, I either call them in to fix it and they aren’t allowed to say ‘in a minute’ or ‘let me finish this first’ or if they ask if they can play a game or go do something, my answer is ‘have you *insert job*’ and majority of the time they run to do it so they can get to do what they want.
    2nd thing is we have a chart with 3 jobs they get paid for at the end of the week if completed and ONE of those jobs is a habit we wanted them to start, the current is making their beds every morning and the 2 eldest are about to lose that as a job and it’ll become a duty while they move on to a new habit.
    Not saying they are perfect solutions but it’s keeping us sane AND they are doing things with less nagging (SOMETIMES NONE!!??)

  • Sadly it is a never ending cycle. Could you try a star chart on the wall. So when shores are done a gold star is given. By the end of the week if all chores are done perhaps give them a treat.

  • I think you deserve some sort of award if you come to the perfect solution here! Having a chart posted on the kitchen wall has reduced (not eliminated) nagging in our house. And the chores have to be done before other things happen: TV, computer time, even dinner if worst comes to worst. We have to do quite a few reminders still – particularly for the oldest – but it is better than it was.

  • I made a sheet that they tick off their chores when completed and this goes towards them getting pocket money. They have to have so many ticks by the end of the week to get their money and that seems to have worked. They like seeing all the ticks and it seems to motivate them both

  • Change the wifi password haha haha that’s all I can think of

  • You might need to turn to punishment or consequences. Start the rule that they get no ipad/tv/whatever works for you time until they have done their chores each day. ONce the chores are done the time is theres.

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