Hello!

13 Answers

anyone here still waiting for a ring??

almost 4 years, 2 kids and nothing. i feel like everyone around me has been together shorter and they’re already booking their wedding date??

i’m getting annoyed, frustrated and jealous whenever i see someone newly getting engaged :(

does anyone feel the same?


Posted by ashlieej, 4th July 2017


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  • All the other moms have commented well and covered all bases nothing left for me to say really …though I have noticed you have not commented on other moms answers so I am wondering if you have taken the advice on board and approached him.


  • He probably thinks you are both happy and why’ rock the boat’ by getting married. Men are afraid of their own shadow. Ask him why he doesn’t want to get married yet. Always be direct with men, never ask questions emotionally, they can’t handle it. But do ask your questions directly, worded carefully, without blame words or accusations. Ask when you both have the time to relax and be alone without the kids. Soften him up with his favourite food, a drink? and dress in something sexy, bait? yes of course it is, after all he is a man!!! Also ask yourself why you want to get married. He is with you now because he wants to be. But marriage makes a lot of men feel they are trapped.!!!!! I hope happiness and love stays with you both. love to all Lyn


  • As so many others have already posted – you need to sit down and talk it through. You both need to make it clear to each other what you both feel and want, and where you see the relationship going. Marriage isn’t the b-all and end-all but it is a commitment, maybe he’s not ready for that yet. Time to lay all your cards on the table – good luck!


  • I would talk to him and tell him how important it is and if he doesn’t want to marry you l would think twice.


  • If a wedding is the most important part of your relationship then you aren’t ready to get married. If you love him then just love being with him. If he wants to get married he’ll ask eventually.


  • Sorry you feel frustrated, jealous and annoyed.
    Your question “how can I get him to marry me” can’t be answered by one of us, but only by the two of you. As other people already have advised I think you need to sit down with your partner and talk about your and his feelings in regards to marriage.
    Not everyone is as quickly ready for marriage or wants to marry at all. There can be many fears, hurts, unresolved trauma’s or memories and insecurity’s what holds us back.
    When you question how can I get him to marry me,
    would you like him to marry you even when he isn’t ready to marry you ?
    would you like him to marry you even when he isn’t 100 % sure about his own feelings ?
    what is it that you think will improve when you marry ?
    Success, hope you can work things out with your partner.


  • for me its over 4 years, 1 stepchild and now a newborn as well.

    we both say that we make the perfect couple even though we are not perfect people. we agree that we are truly meant to be.

    we are also not married with no plans to marry, I would marry him in a heartbeat and he knows it. but I also know he is not into marriage and I know why and understand. I have told him “I love you enough to never marry you”. perhaps you should talk to your partner about how both of you feel and help each other understand the others feelings


  • Maybe sit down together over a dinner or date night and discuss the issue.


  • I sympathise with you, however, for some reason, he pobably thinks he has more freedom if he’s unmarried. I suppose, as long as he is committed to your relationship, all is well. Have you actually spoken to him about it? Always helps to get things out in the open


  • I think you need to talk to him about your feelings, and see what hs are.


  • Sounds like he is just comfortable. Needs a few big hints – just ask him he might be happy you did.


  • have you talked about your feelings with him? he might think that you are content with things as they are because you have already achieved so much together and committed yourselves by having children. He might not understand that you would like the full commitment. Do you know if he actually believes in getting married? maybe he is waiting for a relationship milestone before he pops the question? like being together for 5 years perhaps?

    Don’t force it though because if you pester and annoy him about it he might start to resent it and never actually do it.

    I know lots of couples that have been together for what feels like forever and they are happy without being married. Some think it is only a piece of paper after all.

    Maybe you could test out the waters by asking him if he would like to have a commitment party – gather your friends and family somewhere, get dressed up nicely and in front of family and friends say some words from the heart that cement your relationship to each other. Yes I know it isn’t marriage but maybe he is uncomfortable with the whole church, dinner, dancing etc etc Price tag!!! part of it. Make the commitment ceremony something fun and let him contribute to the planning and if that goes well it might just be enough to make him realise that he can do the whole big wedding thing :)

    Good luck and sorry for rambling in my answer!


  • Why don’t you ask him? :-)


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