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My May 2019 baby was my second baby and when I suffered postnatal depression it was the worst. Has anyone else had a similar experience –  that right now with a three-year-old you are able to look back and see the beauty in your baby which you weren’t able to see at the time?

I’m talking about the cheek in their smile and the glint in their eyes and their chuckles of laughter and of course such beautiful features.

At the time I felt like I didn’t love her as much as I thought I should or would?


Posted anonymously, 6th July 2022


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  • I had PND with my first and I think the worst was I didn’t want to admit it and no one else noticed it they just put it down to that I was tired. I gelt so isolated with no friends or family to turn to. I don’t think I really started to recover until I returned to work 1year after bub


  • I’m still not sure that I have recovered. It’s a long road for some people.


  • For me, no. I had a baby june 2019. and my PND was horrific. I don’t remember a lot during that time, and I feel ripped off. I have photos and what not. but no, I don’t remember those times. I love him now, but I don’t remember probably a good 18 months.


  • I was diagnosed with it when after #4 was born but in hindsight I probably had it with the others also. Medication if you need it, a good therapist if you can find one that works for you and a good support network. Also be open about it and accept any help that is offered.


  • Thanks for sharing that rovermum. Postnatal depression (PND) in not much spoken about , but is thought to affect as many as one in 10 men.
    Sounds you guys walked a difficult road !


  • My husband suffered PND, discovered when he ran off the road in his vehicle into a ditch. He was put on antidepressants immediately and saw a change in his mental health within a week. He then started to notice that I had PND. When he was in it, he couldn’t see it and neither could I. I then went on antidepressants for a much longer time. We had tried for 4 years to have a baby, 2.5 years via IVF and our miracle boy was our last attempt before we were going to give up. My entire pregnancy was traumatic as was the birth and post-birth complications needed my hubby to look after the baby and me when we were sent home. Due to my complications I was also unable to breastfeed. And our son suffered colic and other things in the first year of his life. So we were all in a bit of a mess. Hubby responded quickly to medication. I responded more slowly but had support from my hubby and GP after that.


  • I have no answer or advice, just a thanks for sharing. I was 21 and isolated with my first baby, looking back now I realised I had severe pnd. The simple gesture of not feeling alone can go a long way I think. Aswell as help by a professional


  • When you think you have PND I think professional help is indicated. It’s not really the type of condition you should try to solve with self-help


  • I think I was too busy to even know if I had it. 4 children under 6 is a bit of a handful.


  • Every time you had a negative thinking just try to remember the most beautiful times of your life and keep thinking of them for more that two minutes every time a depression overwhelmed you and believe you’ll get rid of it in less than a week!


  • Yes absolutely. I had it bad with my twins. I remember thinking my tiny baby was ugly (he most definitely was not!) and I could barely hold him. Now I look at my twins and marvel in their beauty. I have so much grief in my experiences


  • I found talking to a mental health care professional really helped.


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