70 Answers

Sorry for the long story, but I need a little advice inregards to Primary school “mum issues”. I made very good friends with a couple of mums a few years ago, and our daughters got along very well, but for reasons unknown to me I have been shunned by both of them. It really hurts as I have no idea why and wasn’t even told that anything was wrong. I am being completely ignored to the point that my “hello” from 1m away, is greeted by a blank face like I’m not there.

As much as this hurts, I’ve put on a brave face and got on with life. As long as they kept this childish behavior to themselves and kept it away from the kids, they could continue.
However, less then a week after I realised I was no longer wanted around, it did start affecting them, and now their two girls have “ganged” up on mine.

I confronted the issue lightly, as a possibility it “might” be happening, and suggested a way it could be worked out through playdates outside school. I was again greeted by complete rudeness and no interest what so ever in the solution. One child did change her behavior though, but the other is now doing the bullying for both of them and at the same time, bulling the other girl into going along with it.

The twist in this is that the mother of the child that has improved has now publicly accused me on social media of calling her child a bully and has said that the teacher has insisted that my child was doing it!
I haven’t been confronted by either the mother or the teacher, whom I am on good speaking terms with, about my child doing anything of the sorts. I am shocked that she has done this so publicly with not even half the story, and made herself and child victim in this situation. I understand that all girls say/do things with out thinking, especially when they are so young, that’s why I didn’t say it was definitely happening, and suggested to take them out of a peer pressured environment so they could reconnect again.

Apart from the kids becoming involved in this nonsense, the false accusation and also the mum of the bully suggesting in a comment that “if the teacher has said it, than there is something more going on” stings more then anything.
It’s the icing on the cake, as the “something else”, is the mums terrible behavior and snide remarks towards my daughter and myself, being said and witnessed by their daughters. I have kept my texts and made screen shots of her accusations just to go over it and make sure I am not in the wrong, I can’t see any fault on my side.

Here is where I need your advice Moms. I’m unsure whether or not to confront the bully’s mum to try sort it out between the girls nicely again, I’m unsure whether or not to confront the mum who is clearly the instigator in the whole mess from the start, to clear up any misunderstanding and I’m also unsure about questioning the teacher about whether or not I need to talk to my daughter about school behavior, as I don’t want the teacher to feel as though she is in the middle of stupid mummy dramas. Do I just drop it and leave it until I see it affecting my daughter again? HELP MoMs! It’s doing my head in as I’m pretty sure this is suppose to be school for kids not a high school rerun for mums. TIA x

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  • I would definitely talk to the teacher about the impact on your daughter; other than that, I would try to rise above it and ignore it. I can’t see anything you could do that would make it better.

  • How did all this pan out for you and your daughter?

  • I’d like to say ignore it, but that usually doesnt help, and you need to look out for your child…Maybe talk to the teacher and see if you can all meet?

  • I would suggest a school conference with all of the parties present; principal, all parents/carers, children and teachers. It needs to be openly discussed with all parties; then all sides will be able to present their case. If this is not resolved; I would stop social media contact with these people and move on to new friends. I would also suggest your child speak to the school counsellor. Good Luck!

  • absolutely disgusting that people behave this way,after so much said about depression,suicide from bullying these ladies should be disgusted in them selves,so,sorry to hear you had to move schools,hopefully you will one day have the confidence to befriend other mothers,we’re not all bad.best of luck.

  • there are some good comments here

  • Just ignore them – they are not worth worrying over.

  • It’s horrible that “adults” can act like that :(

  • That is just so horrible!

  • What a terrible situation to have to deal with – hope it turned out in the end!

  • What did you end up doing?

  • What is the world coming too…

  • How very immature of them, I hope you are able to ease the tension.

  • I hope you get this fixed up soon. I would go to the school. And the eduction department if I need to no bullying in schools

  • Hope you have received some helpful advice.

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