15 Answers

I don’t know how to explain my cousin is gay to my children.

Posted anonymously, 2nd March 2015

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  • At that age they are still too young to really understand.

  • Always aged appropriate and always be honest. Children are resilient and it won’t have an impact on them.

  • Maybe wait until they’re older and can more easily understand what you’re saying. It’s only a cousin, I’m assuming, so you probably don’t see them all that often anyway

  • It’s the question if it needs specific explaining that your cousin is homo. Would you explain when your cousin would be hetero ? However when you kids come with questions I would just answer simple and easy; some boys love girls – some boys love boys / some girls love boys – some girls love girls.

  • I wouldn’t describe it. Because that is a sexual orientation. If it were me I would say that your cousin just likes this differently. There is nothing wrong with being different. But defining someone by their sexual orientation is just that. It would be like saying that how do I describe your cousin as Bing straight. You probably wouldn’t haha. So unless your prepared to have a sexual education class with them I would keep to your cousin just likes different things in a different way and that is ok.

  • Wow , that’s a tough one. I am a direct and honest person so it is best t be truthful . Maybe say xxxx is mature and have decided that she want to have a g/bfriend as she loves him/her . Then maybe you can expand more when they are older as too much information may confuse them at such a young age don’t you think ?

  • This can be a bit tricky. Just tell them that your cousin lives a little bit differently than some other people such as mummy and daddy. That should be ok for now and elaborate when they old enough to understand.

  • I like the advise from bellab that’s how I would present the information also.

  • Do they need to know? are they asking questions? I would answer the questions they ask…. no more and no less.

  • Sometimes things don’t need to be explained. We have a close family friend who is gay and we didn’t say anything to the children. We aren’t at all embarrassed about it.
    If they where to ask why he holds the other boys hand or something just explain to them that love is very special and sometimes a man loves another man and sometimes a woman loves another woman. These days its a lot more “out there” than it used to be. Your children, if they ask, need to know its ok.

  • Thank u all for the great advise :)

  • Unless you have been invited to some sort of commitment ceremony or your cousin visits alot with his partner, you don’t need to explain it in too much detail. i would just explain this situation like the last mom commenter has suggested. Keep it simple for their little minds and they won’t really have too many questions because they don’t really understand the difference as we adults would

  • Mine are about the same age. I said that sometimes a man and a lady fall in love, sometimes two men fall in love, and sometimes two ladies do. They accepted that readily.

  • TENE has said it well. No need to say anything unless they bring it up, and even then, keep it basic and be guided by their questions.

  • I am wondering why you want to tell your children about your cousin being gay? Do you tell them that other relatives are heterosexual? Children of such a young do not need to know about sexual orientation. For a start they would not understand, I have no idea of how to explain to such children. When a child asks a question then answer honestly and do not embellish further. Like many adult concepts, children gradually learn when a situation presents itself.

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