Hello!

My four year old son refuses to dress himself every morning. I end up pulling off his PJs and having to dress him as he lies in bed. He simply refuses to co-operate each and every single morning. I never had this issue with his older brother. Wondering how to get him to the point where he will dress himself in the mornings? At night he takes his own clothes off and is able to get dressed into his PJs. Seems to be an issue of not wanting to get up in the mornings.


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  • Yes I would go for a simple reward chart as well. By doing it in a certain order you can already use part of the morning routine as reward; for example first get dressed, then breakfast. I do this by my youngest who hates brushing hair. She loves her food, so first brush hair-then breakfast.
    See chart for an example


  • Is it a “stage” with some 2 – 3 year old. From the age of about 15 m.o. our youngest has preferred to “hide” and read a book. Both my older children still try to do the same thing. In desperation we have removed books from their bedrooms.
    I would try giving him 2 choices of clothes to wear depending on the weather.
    Some commented about their child saying their jumper is “itchy”. I know children will make excuses not to wear certain clothes. However It may not feel itchy to the parents but some people do get itchy from some types of fabrics. One of my uniforms (I loved my uniforms) didn’t feel itchy to touch but it didn’t “breathe” on my skin and it did make me itchy. Sometimes I got a fine rash like heat rash even in the cold weather. Wool doesn’t affect me but a lot of synthetic or even part synthetic do make me itchy and sweaty. It is so very frustrating. Some clothes look beautiful but I can’t wear them for more than about 2 hours.


  • don’t give in to him. My son is 3 and he dresses himself. We do breakfast first though and usually carry him to the table to eat. Once he’s eaten he livens up and I just lay his clothes out for him.


  • Would like to know as well. I have the same problem with my 6 year old. ???? must be a morning thing


  • Do you have clothes he loves? maybe if he chooses his own clothes he might be easier to dress?


  • this makes me laugh.. I know its a age different compared to my daughter whos 7…she hated wearing winter clothes in winter when she was little. I let her feel the weather around her, if she doesn’t have it, she doesn’t have it and I remind her about the discussion that we had that morning when I have warned her…even now at age 7, shes refusing to wear a jumper to school in 4 degs in the morning because 1, its uncool, 2, want to wear a different jumper that’s not part of the school uniform, 3, she says it itches (not true as its not a knitted jumper and ive checked) 4, its not brand new! she has worn no pants throughout the whole winter last year, shes so far is doing it this winter. its either a school jumper or nothing I say. there was one time she wouldn’t wear her school shorts, she wanted to wear jeans shorts, we were running late for school just over arguing with her about clothes and school uniforms, my daughter was in her undies, I left to go into my car with her school shorts as it was up to her to wear shorts or not….of course she put the shorts on as I know she wouldn’t go outside without anything on her legs.. when she was much younger, I did bring clothes with me incase when she went without…sometimes u just have to bring the clothes incase your son changes his mind. if people look at you, who cares, ur son is happy is the main thing….( as for saying that my daughter doesn’t have a choice when it comes to school uniforms otherwise shes wearing shorts and a singlet in this weather below 11degs now and shes happy)


  • Yes let him pick his own clothes for sure and perhaps a reward!


  • let him pick his clothes even if he picks a zany combo. make sure he gets enough sleep


  • Maybe a reward chart to get him started?


  • What happens after getting dressed? Do you go to work or are you at home with him? If you go to work maybe getting dressed signifies a part of the day he doesn’t look forward to? (the drop off, which is pretty normal) Depending on what you guys do next in the day may help talk him through it… such as what emotions he has, that it’s ok, but sometimes we have to do things we don’t want, getting dressed is a great way to feel more awake.
    I love the other ideas so far. Maybe also turn it into a game. Can he put his pants on by the time you…. spin around 3 times, count to 10.


  • I simply left the clothes for the next day out; after a while he automatically started dressing himself.


  • I created a chart for my son to get ready in the mornings. It was pictures with tick boxes next each chore…..started with make bed (well as best they can), get dressed, eat breakfast, clean teeth, brush hair, pack bag. Although it’s still there and he may be difficult, it’s incorporated into a ‘fun thing’ to tick off and isn’t a stand alone job, maybe he will just do it. My son is amazing at night but slow and struggling in the morning. This worked for us and i think he likes the autonomy and thinks it’s a bit funny when he does it in a different order.


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