10 Answers

Would love to have Christmas at home this year, we have a big family now and would love the kids to enjoy Christmas within their own house. We normally swap between my parents one year and my in-laws the next. But this year I don’t want to do either, so how exactly do you explain and try and not offend family in saying that we want Christmas at our house with our family of 6?

Posted by kjgarner, 9th November 2015

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  • Just tell them, exactly how you said it here. If they’re going to be offended, it doesn’t matter how you say it

  • yeah just tell them. the good thing is that our family is pretty relaxed so you can tell them no and it is fine. i am sure that you would have been fine too :)

  • I’m in the same position :( it suuuuuuuuuucks! Usually we spend breakfast at the inlaws, to my parents after that to open presents, then back to the inlaws for lunch, to my aunties (in a different town) after that and then maybe if we’re lucky we get home to spend time as a family just as its bed time :( Inlaws don’t seem to want to include my family in anything and now its just mum and dad on my side, makes it really hard. I just want to stay home so my little girl isn’t being dragged around all day. She’s so tired by the end of the day. I keep getting told that it’s just one day and I get that but arrrgggghhh just so frustrating! I have chronic fatigue syndrome which is seriously not fun at the best of times. I’m laid out until after new years after xmas day.
    Why can’t people just be understanding! Especially when you have kids!!
    I would love to say do what makes you happy! If you have hubby’s support that’s a different story. Good luck and Merry Christmas :)

  • mixed reactions… Some not fond of the idea but o’well our choice

  • Snap! My daughter is in the exact same position! Her in laws have planned a lunch, my hubby works and she’s been trying to work out how to fit everything in. She would rather stay home and let everyone who wants to see them come to them, but the boyfriend doesn’t. It’s all sorted now though……she just found out she’s not even invited to the in laws lunch, the boyfriend ied her to believe she was just so she would go

  • Yes I do like upfront and honest!

  • I always try this every year to stay home and usually give in. This year we have said to the family they can come to our house for Christmas if they want to see the kids but we aren’t going anywhere. I can understand you wanting to have Christmas just with your household however Christmas is an important time to spend with all the family. Maybe you could organise to spend some time either just before or just after Christmas to spend with each family and make each special.

  • Best to be up front and just say it – they will cope with it and may even surprise you.

  • I think it’s best just to tell them that you’d prefer to stay home on Christmas Day, but that you will catch up with everyone at other times. They may be happy with the change in routine. Alternatively, you might like to start a new tradition and invite them to your place.

  • We sometimes do the big family event on Boxing Day instead. It works if everyone who will be affected agrees. It’s also more relaxing and a bit more fun for everyone as the “main event” is over. We have done this when various family members have had work commitments or other commitments. Good luck!

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