18 Answers

My 8 year old has come home from school asking why his friends are telling him Santa is not real. I knew it would happen, but I have never really thought about how to deal with the truth. We have a 6, and 2 year old who are still true believers. We want to keep the magic alive for all of them at Christmas.

Posted by Sotomumof3, 27th November 2020

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  • I like tessie’s answer. Similar to what I said to my daughter.

  • He’s at the age where he’s naturally going to start questioning that way. I think it’s important to pull him aside and tell him the truth but with strict instructions not to spoil it for the younger siblings- maybe he could even help you with ideas on how to make things extra special. He’ll feel mature and responsible too.

  • There are some great examples on the interest if you google this. My daughter found out before Xmas this year. We told her that Santa is the spirit of Christmas, which is all about giving and helping others and bringing joy. Now that she found out she too is a “Santa” and her job each Xmas is to give to and help others and bring joy to others including her younger siblings.

  • I think you say that Santa is real and you can believe in the magic even if some of your friends don’t.

  • I actually have a Christmas card given to me by my Nanna many, many years ago. It tells the story of St Nick and how Christmas came about. We never told our boys anything until they asked if the Santa they saw at the shopping centre was real. We explained to them that Santa couldn’t be everywhere at once so he had helpers and now those helpers would work for him every year so no children missed out.

  • They will know it one day. But the make sure to keep it real because of the gifts.

  • I always answer my kids with “I believe in the magic of Christmas and all it brings”. I did use to tell them that if you don’t believe, you don’t receive but then that’s not true, but I do believe in the magic of Christmas

  • We just always said if you don’t believe you won’t receive. We kept the magic alive until he was 10, nearly going to High School as we felt the time was right. And it was easier with an only child, we could control our version. It was seriously a battle though.

  • Not everyone is going to like this, but if it were my child I would tell him the truth, but tell him not to go around telling all the kids because a lot still believe, especially younger ones. This way they know they can trust you to tell the truth, even though it may hurt.

  • It’s something I’m working on myself. My plan is to say that he WAS real … St Nicholas was a real person many many years ago. He brought gifts to children which gave them joy and wonderment. But as we are human we don’t live forever. His legacy is one that we carry on as adults and it’s a very important milestone when a kid becomes that little bit older – they now get to understand the meaning behind the selfless act of giving a gift and watching the joy amd wonderment of others.

    It’s a legacy that we keep alive from a very real person

  • Say something like.. “well, do you believe in Santa?” If he says yes then say “that’s all that matters then, believers keep the Christmas magic alive, And read him a Santa story or something if he says no, follow it up with questions of why and see where the conversation leads, if he has a good concept of why he thinks he isn’t real just explain to him the true story of Santa, and say that he needs to remember that keeping the magic alive for the other kids is now his special secret and he can’t tell them because they still believe

  • When this happens you tell them the truth. Santa is an idea to create magic for Christmas, but his friends have spoilt that for him now. He can’t stay a child and naive forever and because he is asking for the truth then you need to give it to him or you break his trust and he won’t trust you again. So let your son grow up and be there to always answer his questions truthfully.

  • Google Santa Clause on your own and find a good story about him to show your child and remind him that Santa Clause only leaves presents for those children who believe in him. That also gets round the problem of the other children saying their parents had bought the gifts they receive at Christmas.

  • I love the Saint Nicholas story and think that this is a great one to tell the children, however I always told mine that if you don’t believe Santa won’t visit and that fixed the problem. Mine believed until they were in high school and I had five. The youngest believed as the older children didn’t spoil it for him until he was also at high school (he was 7 years younger than the next child.

  • Just tell him the truth. Better to be honest with your kids

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