14 Answers

HELP!! My son has just started kindy and I am sitting in the car dreading having to get out to pick him up from school! I thought starting school would be tough on him. But I’m the one who’s struggling. Anyone else feel like school drop-off/pick-up is like being back at school. There are little cliques everywhere and I feel so new and out of place. I really don’t want to just barge my way into a conversation and I land up just standing at the side lines reading my phone and pretending not to care! It’s stressful and I hate the pressure. Any tips on how to survive and thrive the school pick-up for a newbie? Thanks!


Posted anonymously, 7th February 2020


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  • Don’t worry over time you will find mums/dads to chat to. As time progresses you get to know other parents through going each day and seeing everyone. Also with the events that will bring you to school you will get chatting with other parents. It just takes a little time. Just beware of the gossipers and make friends with the nice ones. You will soon find your feet, in the mean time just enjoy seeing your child develop in this new stage of his life. Good luck and try not to worry about it.


  • I’m pretty sure you’re not the only one feeling like that. I used to go pick my kids up from outside their classrooms and knew no one. I just made sure I smiled and said hi if someone made eye contact with me and over the weeks started small chats and now I have a whole new group of amazing friends that I couldn’t imagine my life without. Some people will already know each other as they have older kids at the school but most I found were friendly and happy to chat.


  • Take your time…dont need to something because everyone is doing it…i am pretty sure there is more than one mum or dad stranding there and thinking the same


  • All the newbies feel like that. After a few weeks you kind of figure out who all the other mums in the same boat are and it gets a bit friendlier. Just hang in there. It really is just like being back at school.


  • I go drop off pick up and keep to myself. There are too many Mummies that think they are still the most popular


  • I’m doing kinder this year and feel the same. Feel left out when all the other parents are taking to eachother


  • Yes it can be hard but I used to just walk them into the playground and drop him off there and then make sure they are alright and then leave and the same in the afternoon.


  • Don’t be on your phone, it makes you unapproachable. Just say hi to other Mums and conversations will gradually start.


  • Focus more on your child and less on the cliques of other mums. Get off your phone, no way will you be able to engage in a conversation of any kind with a phone in your hand, that’s just rude. Stress less


  • Bless you ! I would actually take some extra time and be early to drop him off and pick him up so there is time to connect. Just start with a small greeting, a question about homework, side words, or simply ask which child is yours and how is he/she doing. It may take some time and eh I would put the phone down ;)


  • If you are wanting to get friendly with any of these parents then maybe try smiling at them as you go passed or find out your kids friends and who their parents are and try just with making sure you say hello to them. You never know who else might be feeling the same way as you.


  • Just smile at all the other new mums as you pass on your way in and out. Comment now and again or ask others waiting around how their child has settled in and which teacher they have. After a while of seeing the same faces every morning and afternoon and all standing around together waiting for the bell you naturally get to know them a bit better and can start having conversations. Particularly other parents from your child’s class. Soon you’ll be running into so and so’s mum in the supermarket or classmate and dad in the park.
    Volunteering is also a great way to get involved and meet others.


  • I think you should get off your phone and try and stand near or with a group. You don’t have to talk a lot, just try and move into the conversation little by little.


  • I just get in and out as quickly as possible. As I’ve moved to Tasmania from Brisbane and it’s a small community it seems like a lot of people know each other and they’re not that inclusive of newcomers. Don’t let it worry you, just get there when the bell has gone and grab him as soon as he comes out. Then you can spend some time with him and take him to a park or do crafts at home and ask him about his day.


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