13 Answers

Help! I’m wondering how to cope with 2 babies under 2!

My first born has just turned 10 months and I am currently 5 weeks pregnant. (Big suprise!!) My head is all over the place as this was not planned. I have a baby who’s not even 1 yet and that’s a lot of work … and now I’ll have 2 under 2. I’m freaking out about it!

Any reassurance or helpful tips or just words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated.

Posted anonymously, 8th July 2021

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  • For us having two under two, routine was the key. We eventually got both onto a similar sleeping schedule and it helped so much. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and remember, this was hard for me but the housework can wait!

    Wishing you all the very best

  • Just enjoy it. If the house work doesn’t get done today it’s always there tomorrow. Know it’s ok to just sit and cuddle for the day without the expectations of anything else.
    I find doing up a routine for myself to stick to works well for me. Today I clean bathrooms tomorrow is bed sheets something like that.
    And remember to always take time for yourself !

  • I had 2 little ones under 22months, and my eldest decided to drop his day nap a month before his sister was born.

    Make sure you ask for help when you need it. I made sure I had a freezer full of meals and snacks to make it easier. I let my son get involved so if I was changing bubs nappy I would ask him to pass me the wipes and nappy and he loved helping out.

    Trying to get them on a similar routine does help, so if you can get them down for a nap at the same time it’ll make a big difference.

    The housework can wait, make sure you look after yourself too I know it’s hard but get someone to watch them while U have a hot shower or meal.

    Wishing you all the best xx

  • Don’t overcommit yourself to things. Just relax and take your time. I feel like kids and babies can sense our emotions too.
    If getting out of the house one day is just not working then cancel the plans don’t feel bad about it.
    Do what works for YOU.
    My husband was away a lot so I slept on a mattress on the floor with a kid either side and that’s the only way we could all sleep. And for everyone that commented on it I just smiled and nodded and continued doing my thing.

    Save your sanity.

  • The best advice I can give is to toilet train the first baby before the other arrives. My mother had me do this by sitting the child on a potty/potty chair in front of television shows for children – Sesame Street; Playschool etc each morning after breakfast. Then take the child to the toilet every hour, and if you continue this they will be trained very quickly. Organise a contained play area for the child with their toys and play things and ensure that they are used to being in this area for an hour at a time to give you time to look after the baby and any other household duties. You will find that this will help you greatly.

  • The first weeks probably will be very challenging, but it will get easier. You’ll work out systems and shortcuts, and that’ll help.

  • Hey I had my second child when my first was 16 months. Not going to lie it’s tough.. but you will get through it. I did. Now mine are nearly 4 and 2.5. I had some serious mum guilt because I felt like I wasn’t giving enough time to the eldest so I set aside a bit of time with him just one on one when the baby was sleeping. Just remember the hard stage doesn’t last for ever and always ask someone for help when you need 5 minutes to yourself. Try and set some you time for yourself as well. Good luck! You’ve got this! You will be amazing!

  • I had two under two as well and was totally freaking out buti just took things one thing at a time.
    Whenever my toddler was demanding I would just try and get her involved in what I was doing with the baby. She had a concept of things generally so I would ask her to go and get me a bib for the baby or to give the baby a hug when he was crying etc. And she would do what I asked and calm down.
    Just be kind to yourself and ask for help when you can!
    Hubby is a shift worker so I feel like a single mum most of the time but when he is around then I definitely ask him to do little bits and pieces to ease the load.

  • Forgot to say Congratulations by the way! I love the age gap. People mistake them for twins and they are best friends.

  • My son was 9 months when I fell pregnant with my daughter and now I have another. 3 kids under 4. It is tough at first but to help I purchased a travel cot and would sometimes put my son in that with some toys when I was trying to feed my daughter. He used to climb and get into everything so this way I could watch him and keep him controlled while feeding.

  • I had my first July 2014, second august 2016 and third September 2017.
    Routine. That’s my only advice we had a morning routine and a night routine and everything in between was a free for all. When the third was born some days she would need more attention and others the 1 year old needed me. Some days my only achievement for the day would be having a shower without one crying and some days I’d get a lot done but just having those set things in place morning and night helped a lot. We started trying to get our baby to self settle as soon as we found out I was pregnant again and she was 4 months old so if I needed to feed the newborn I could at least lay her down and know she didn’t need me to lay patting her for 2 hours like my eldest used to haha

    If all else fails… and your not breastfeeding wine haha

  • My advice- less you expect then u will be less disappointed if that doesn’t happen…

  • When my first was 3,5 months old I fell pregnant with my second. My first was also prem (10wks early, 880 gram) and by the time my son was born she was still only in size 4-6 months clothes.
    When I fell pregnant I felt a bit overwhelmed too !
    But it all worked out perfectly fine.
    Share tasks in household and loved king after your eldest with your partner/husband once the baby is born and take it one day at the time.
    My first and second formed a beautiful bond and growing up close together was really fun !
    You got this mum, fear not ! Xx

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