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My daughter is 5 years old.  Every night I have to ask her to clean her room, which almost every time ends in my daughter having a melt down.  I can help her clean (or tidy) her room and then the next day it is like bomb has exploded.  I have tried asking her nicely, reward charts, timeouts, confiscating toys or favourite things, stay in room till its clean and still she will not clean her room. Do any parents have any ideas on how to get their child to clean (or even tidy) their bedroom?


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  • Maybe she doesn’t know how to do it herself, or just lacks the motivation. Could you model cleaning your own room and talk about the benefits of having a clean room, then show her how to clean her own room


  • I feel for you… my kids are older and still do this. But listen to everyone else. Wish I did. Start young!!


  • Five is still quite young. Try a fun and easy approach.. Make sure everything has a place. Maybe try the rule of not having anything new out until the rest is packed away. Also…..night time is when she is most tired. Maybe try cleaning up earlier in the afternoon. Then having contained playing or a craft activity in another room later.


  • i grab everything on the floor and hide it in the cupboard saying i threw it out. im also not beneath bribery lol that works a treat.


  • Honestly I just tell my children that anything left on the floor will go in the bin or I’ll give it away if they don’t clean it. Majority of the time they will listen.


  • Have a basket and puts things in that aren’t packed away. If it’s still there end of the day take the basket away. She gets the toys in the basket back when she earns it. From doing chores etc, if that doesn’t work make it fun! Hide something like a coin and tell her only way to find is by cleaning


  • I would get her to realise it’s her doing it and she is responsible for keeping it today and that you are not helping do it and don’t pick up anything and don’t let her get away with a tantrum over it. She will realise that she has to do it and if no clothes are put in the laundry then they don’t get washed and if she needed say sport uniform and she never put it in the wash then she has to tell the teacher why she doesn’t have it. Don’t be her slave and give in you have to stay strong to make it work and no friends over if not tidy and teach to vacuum as well.


  • My eldest used to sweep everything under his bed when told to clean it. Never knew because the bedspread would hide everything. When I’d done all of the washing and he said next day he had no clean underwear decided to search his room. Everything on the floor went into a bag and was thrown away (put in garage without him knowing) and he had to go to school with no underpants (I hated doing that to him but it was necessary). His room was always clean after that. Oh and the things I’d “thrown away” magically came back


  • Oh may try some of these ideas…


  • Give some rewards for doing that.


  • I learned to shut the door. My son’s room, his space. He’s responsible for it. Just shut the door. Oh, and if I can’t see the floor, I don’t vacuum it!


  • Sounds like you’ve already tried some of the methods I do. Another I do with my son who is 6 is that he’s not allowed out of his room until it’s tidy. Also, try not to keep too many toys in the bedroom, but have another area where they’re kept.


  • Not clean-put in the bag and take it away…..return things in week…month…that what is working at our home


  • My 9yr old struggles with this and dirty undies and socks are stacked and hidden everywhere in her room. First of all I do not ask her to tidy her room daily. Secondly when she tidies something on own initiative, I praise her abundantly ! Thirdly, I don’t see anything wrong with helping her a bit, it’s about teaching how to organise. She loves her food, so fourthly I often ask if she can tidy her room a bit before I serve dinner. When she does it’s a big Hi five !


  • I was told to pick your battles. Some just aren’t worth the fight. So I ended up just closing the door so I didn’t have to see the mess. As she gets older, there will be bigger issues, don’t waste your time on unimportant things


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