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8 Answers

Not sure they realise they have it


Posted anonymously, 14th December 2019


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  • Why can’t you just raise it in conversation? Say you’ve noticed this if that and was wondering if she was doing ok. If she says yes but you suspect otherwise, keep popping in and helping out when you can. Maybe she’ll open up, if not, you’ll be a huge help


  • It’s a really hard question, but I would honestly approach the partner first


  • I asked if I could help do the washing as I could see it piling up. I didn’t comment about it being there though. I knew prior to that that it was one thing the Mum appreciated help with. Often I called in again later and took the washing in off the line and sorted them according to each room. After a few times the Mum was willing to show me where they were put away. It saved her a lot of time to able to not have to try to rush so much and on occasions have a rest or nap while baby was asleep. If there is older children maybe offer to take them out or even just home with you for a few hours if you can.


  • I am going through post natal.
    My partner mustered up the courage and asked if I was feeling ok or if I thought I might need extra support.

    He said something like
    You seem a bit out or sorts lately, are you ok? Then, after a few days, when I said no I wasn’t, he asked what he could do and if I needed extra support.

    Don’t offer a solution, let them lead the conversation. They have to come to the conclusion themselves otherwise they may resist help.

    Hope this helps.


  • Maybe you could print off a survey/questionnaire and encourage her to fill it out?


  • Approach with care and maybe speak about someone else who has it


  • Just talk to them, offer them help if they need it but don’t push it. I think just being there helps, a text or call to see how they are doing. Depending on who they are, offering relief from baby by looking after them a short period?


  • I think be very careful not to tell them how you think they’re feeling. mAybe start with something like “you seem to be finding some things difficult, do you need any help?”


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