8 Answers

I’ve been a step mum now for 7 years, and have been a full time step mum for almost 6. Being a step mum is hard. I’m dammed if I do, dammed if I don’t. I love my kids, there are no steps in my home, just family. I have been labeled the evil step mum for so long, and it is truly messing with my mental health. I am hoping someone can offer any idea of online support groups for step parents that are not based on Facebook as I have been stalked for the majority of the past 7 years. Something that is secure.

Posted anonymously, 7th January 2020

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  • That sounds awful, I’m sure there must be a number of programs focused on healthy blended families. The only real advice I can offer is by saying one day they will realise the love and care you have given them and the poison they have been fed of lies and deceit.

  • Poor you. You must be feeling so down. Did u talk to your gp ?

  • It must be tough feeling this way ! By who have you been labeled the evil step mum ? When this are people you’re close to like friend or family, could you talk with them about how much their words hurt ?
    When you google several online support groups come up. I would just one by one contact them and see what they have to offer. Your Mental Health is important, take it serious. Talk with friends or a counselor when you need.

  • Sorry to hear you are going through such a tough time …. Stepfamilies Australia have a good website that offers advice and support, might be worth a look! Good luck!

  • No advice here but stay strong – you are not the evil step mum. Unfortunately there are lots of negative people out there. Hopefully this question goes to the mom fb page and you get some ideas of where to seek help.
    But perhaps talk to your partner first and see if they can help?

  • It might be worth having a chat to your doctor about the mental health problems, they maybe able to help you on the group session side of things and also might be able to help with a mental health plan. It may also be worth just talking to the kids and ask why they call you that? Ask them if there is something you can do to change it and explain why it hurts to be referred to as “the evil step mum”

  • There are community support groups in some local councils. You could give them a call

  • Do you know why you are being labelled the evil Step Mum. Do the kids have any contact with the Mum or their grandparents ?? If so they are probably being influenced by her / them. Depending on their ages maybe they don’t feel comfortable taking you into their confidence. If they go to school is there a counsellor they can talk to. I’m not sure if they are allowed to tell you anything that is said but you may be able to ask for suggestions. Perhaps diplomatically ask them if they are being bullied at school or any other activities they go to. Do all the children have their Dad’s surname? If you are having mental health problems as a result of the issue maybe talk to your Dr and be given a referral….if you really need one. I hate to say it but families can cause a lot of issues for others

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