29 Answers

I have 2 wonderful kids (4 yrs & 20 mths) that keep me on my toes. They are my world but I feel like our family is incomplete. I was wanting to hear other’s stories about how they coped adding a 3rd bub to their families.

Posted anonymously, 18th March 2015

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  • I found going from 2 to 3 easier than going from 1 to 2 – I already knew how to manage more than one kid. And as they get older, it only gets easier and more rewarding.

  • How you cope is entirely up to you, it’s a personal thing. I think we learn to adjust as our situations change. So whether you have 3 or 4 kids or stick at 2, you’ll adjust

  • Just do what is right for you and your family.

  • I have four kids and there all approx 16mnths apart. Yes it’s very hard work but if your like me and like big families, it’s also very rewarding. Especially when they begin to become independent. The key to having lots of kids and not going crazy is to have a strict schedule, for me anyway! Good luck on what ever you decide.

  • I remembered a friend of mine really wanted a 3rd , but couldn’t decided about having it and affordability and really wanted a girl ( as already has 2 boys ). I said , kids will never be cheap , but if you want another one would you be happy with either sex and she did end up having a daughter. So everyone is different and “super hard ” to one mum can be easy for another . I only have two and due to financial and emotional/physical reasons decided not to have any more .

  • I think it all depends on age gaps etc. each family is different.

  • When it comes to juggling the various schedules it can get interesting but otherwise three is great. Mine are not close together though so I wou assume that would make things both easier and tougher.

  • 3 is tough, I think 2 would have been perfect. Obviously I wouldnt change it now, we always wanted 2 and got 3 with twins when my son was 3 1/2
    its still tough even though they are all pretty great kids. I just feel with 2 sharing my time and attention would have been alot easier.
    I think each child deserves at least 3-4 yrs before another sibling comes along so maybe see how you feel then :)

  • I had twins and then a surprise 20 mnths later, so 3 under 2years, hard work and I remember an older woman who had 3 children herself telling me that one child is easy, 2 play together nicely but the third one is the straw that breaks the camels back, I would agree but would not change a thing, If you can afford and accommodate a third child and would love another child then do it, you will not remember the sleepless nights and hard work in a few years but you do remember all the good times, the hugs and the love from your children, do what you and your partner want.

  • 3 is different to 2. they all go off in different directions, 2 will play nicely but if the 3rd jumps in theres fights, different tastes, likes and wants, different attitudes, personalities, but i wouldnt change it for the world. I still long for a 4th, but i just cant do it, body wont let me

  • I know that incomplete feeling. My eldest were 5 and 3 when our 3rd child arrived. For me, it was a wonderful. The older children loved to help, life got a bit noisier, the washing pile grew a fraction, and I got more cuddles. To me, it actually felt easier with 3 children than just 2. But there was that feeling. We were devastated with the loss of another pregnancy, but when our kids were 11, 9, and 6, we welcomed our 4th baby. Baby 4 meant buying a bigger car, and reorganising one bedroom to take 2 children again. Life is noisy and busy and messy, but in reflection, I don’t feel that much busier than I did with only two children. And that feeling? Sometimes it’s still there, I picture what life with 5 children aged 0-14 would be like; other days (now the teenage years are invading our family) I shake my head and remember – there will be grandkids.

  • 3 kids is hard. Its a lot different from 2. Mums don’t come with 3 arms lol my boys are nearly 6,5 and 10 months. I don’t have much help so juggling a newborn, school, preschool, shopping, cleaning, cooking and time for myself or hubby ( forget that haha )
    But at the end of the day its worth it. If you have help and support then i reckon it would make the world of difference. For me i struggle and feel i spread myself too thin.

  • I had 3 children, 13 months difference between the first 2 and 2years for the 3rd, they were a handful, yes, and i was super busy, but they grew together and at 28, 27 and 25, they are all great friends and would not havee done anything differently.

  • I’ve got 2 little girls (4 years tomorrow and 2 years last week) and am 9 weeks pregnant with Three (number 3, not triplets!)
    Our Three has come as a bit of a surprise and while I had never felt a huge incompleteness with having two kids like I did when it was just out one child, when we found out, both hubby and I felt like it was just perfect.
    We’ve talked about maybe having a third and held on to most of our baby things “just in case”. So while I think we didn’t actually decide for sure that we would have a third, we did want him/her!
    Hubby actually said his biggest concern was that it would make things financially a bit tighter, he had wanted another baby to cuddle and love.
    We do however need a bigger car as it’s been a tight fit in our Honda Civic sedan already!

    And I do think that things will be harder and busier with three, but at the same time they will have to fit in with the rest of the family having to take miss 4 to kindy three days a week and daddy to TAFE and work.
    While with a first you often just revolve around their chosen sleeping and waking times, consecutive babies have to slot in with life of the family.

    Good luck making your decision, hopefully it doesn’t get made for you!

  • I am facing this dilemma now myself. I have a 5 year old and an 18 month old and would really love another child. I think our main concern is financial. We are worried that it will be hard for us to pay for our kids extra curricular activities and go on family holidays. Can anyone tell me if that extra child makes it that much harder financially?

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