58 Answers

I was wondering what other mums felt about the new trend of making sure no one feels left out or loses? Everyone gets a ribbon or everyone get a trophy? I think it’s harmful, the children that did win, that moment gets taken away from them because ‘Everyones A Winner’… I was one of those very short little girls, running in the 100m race with girls that had legs up to halfway between my belly button and nipples, I had no chance of winning, but I ran, I lost and I didn’t get a medal or ribbon and I can tell you now, it didn’t scar me it made me stronger and understand and strenghs and weakness. So Mums what do you think, should everyone be a winner?

Posted by kristyp, 18th November 2013

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  • I remember a birthday party I organised for one of my kids when in Kindy, resulted in drama cause those who didn’t won a price started crying. So much so that I quit the party games and we did something else instead. Kids need a certain maturity to learn to deal with losing. I don’t say you have to avoid this, it’s good to help them to learn to deal with this (but maybe not in a birthday party setting)

  • I honestly think it depends on the event. There are times when celebrating a winner is important; there are times when celebrating effort and participation is important.

  • I think it is more of an encouragement award to say everyone’s a winner for trying .

  • I agree with you. It never harmed us as kids. We were just happy to take part in things. Sometimes we might have had our hearts set on winning but lost, were sad for a bit but got over it. I think its doing more harm than good, especially in this day and age!

  • When my son played Auskick, all the kids got a participation trophy. There were other trophies for outstanding players. I think it was nice to acknowledge all the kids on the team. It’s not nice seeing the same kids get the prizes year after year

  • No, I think its ridiculous. Kids need to learn to lose. Not everyone is going to win in life. You need to learn to strive, to work hard, if you lose, you need to work harder. I think we are setting kids up to be lazy, to think that showing up is all that is needed to win.

  • I’m with you! Kids need to know what it feels like to lose. It builds resilience and coping skills. When they join the grown up,world, they’ll quickly learn not everyone is a winner. If they’re not taught this early, they’ll just crumble in the adult world

  • I know at parties I like to make sure everyone ‘wins’ a prize but for real races, netball games, physie, dance, footy etc I’m with you and believe that the winners should be celebrated and the ‘non winners’ encouraged but also taught to be a gracious loser and that it’s about participation and giving it your best.

  • I really think it depends on age, I agree with a 1st, 2nd and 3rd ribbon but what about participation ribbons for everyone else, that way everyone still gets a ribbon but first, second and third are still acknowledged,

  • I agree with you- there are other ways of making you feel like a winner. Just keep reinforcing to your kids it’s all about fun and having a go. I know a few kids who forfeit (at age 7!) rather than lose, which is sad

  • Always teach winning and losing, its a part of life, that’s fair i think!

  • I think kids do need to learn that noone everyone can be a winner etc – but it is a good idea to give all the kids a participation award or something similar but maybe at the end of the day when they are sitting in the group so it’s not all about the immediate race and rewards etc.

  • I don’t believe everyone should get a prize, this doesn’t help them. They need to learn that there are winners and loosers and they need to try a bit harder and achieve that winning ribbon/trophy.

  • what did you end up doing

  • there are some good comments here

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