Hello!

6 Answers

How do you deal with BPD, Life changing events (seperation),
Diagnosed in January, reading up I can see where it has affected me throughout life. Getting help slowly. I see the same characteristics in my 8 year old son. How do I help him when I’m unable to get the right help for myself? I don’t want him to get to my age (36) and wish someone had intervened, looked into it, made an effort. I have so much trouble dealing with it now and prior to diagnosis that I feel I am so set in my response ways I need to step in and help my son see the other side/understand what’s going on. Plus if I have trouble dealing with my emotions etc and hate myself, how much is he feeling being so young and no idea what’s happening or why he does things.


Posted by mom143397, 17th May 2021


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  • I have BPD and I can understand the challenges. My advice is to find a psych that understands BPD so that you have someone to talk to that understands what you are going through. Don’t be afraid to take medication. I have found that medication has helped (anti-psychotics which sound worse than they are). And try not to let the stigma get to you. You are doing the best you can and it is also an extremely positive that you are looking at your child’s best interests. Be open with your child so they are not afraid to ask questions.


  • Go to your GP and ask for a referral to see a Phycologist at the Children’s Hospital. They will help you and him and if you need more help they will organise a psychiatrist and get a diagnoses and help for him at school. It will be a team effort. I had a friend who was having trouble with her son and I gave the same advice and now this boy is 15 and he has a great life. He is still going to appointments at the local Children’s Hospital always keeping him on track.


  • Thanks for your advice, seeing counsellor at school. Dr wants me to get sorted before I worry about him.

    The most appreciated part is that each of you have told me “great job, good on you for seeking help”, those few words can make all the difference


  • I haven’t experienced this first hand. I do think, with all the info on the internet, that you could probably find some help there


  • The cause of BPD isn’t actually well understood. But I do think that children can pick up on behaviour patterns and negative feelings from parents and learn from the example given, hence you see quite often a family history of BPD. Good on you for seeking help ! Hope it is effective.


  • Although I have no personal experience of this, I suggest you visit your GP and advocate for an urgent referral to a pyschiatrist to properly assess your son. Good on you for wanting to make sure he gets help early.


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