14 Answers

I imagine that this is common. My husband is addicted to his phone. I talk to him but he is looking at his screen. He sometimes says that he can do two things at once and other times says he can not. I request eye contact when we are talking as I consider it rude and not good modeling for my children. I am keen to hear the experiences and tips from others.

Posted anonymously, 25th September 2018

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  • Time for a good and open chat about this I think.

  • I hate to say it but I think I can be like this at times too…. I am trying to do a no phones after dinner plan so we still have quality time together.

  • He has made his choice to ignore you and set a bad example for your children. How many times can you ask for his attention while he is ignoring you and expect a different result? I honestly believe people have an addiction to the screens. What is more important than engaging with family?

    You have a choice to make, just as he has made his.

  • Research has also proven that people cannot focus and give their full attention to 2 things at the same time.

  • I insist on phone free/device free time and I find it highly rude if anyone chooses their phone over eye contact and conversation. I suggest a box or container or place for mobile free/device free time.

  • Maybe have regular set times with ‘no phone’ rule. Why does he spend so much time on his phone? Is it for work purposes? Or social media? Or maybe he’s having an affair??? ????

  • My husband is the same. Sometimes I have actually sent him a facebook message while we are out for dinner just to be smart. He often doesn’t listen, but I think it is important to try to establish phone free time like at the dinner table for instance. We usually have some phone free time when we go for an evening walk.

  • I am lucky that my husband is not addicted to his phone. He puts it on the bench when he gets home from work and only refers to it during the night if it pings. It’s a lesson we’re teaching our teenage son and great role modelling where we both put our phones on the bench after work and only look at them if they ping. My son is constantly on his phone and we’re teaching him about manners, courtesy, rudeness, respect… and always remind him that he’s not learning his behaviour from us.

  • Mine does exactly the same thing!!!

    It’s so annoying.

    I have fights with him about this and it’s gotten a bit better.

  • Me too. I agree that it’s not good modeling for children and it is rude – it shows you really aren’t being paid attention to. I talked with my husband about this and we have a rule now that phones are away until the kids are in bed. And even then, if someone asks a question or is talking to you, you must put the phone down to answer. It’s hard – they really are addictive!!

  • Mine plays game after game, we went on holiday and visited my parents, he sat on his butt and was waited on hand and foot, he sat in the bed until his coffee was made and then he go back and lay on the bed and play his games on his phone…he did take the bins out once, I am so sick of that phone I’m ready to throw it out!

    I did swap his phone with a new iPhone that has a shorter battery life?

  • Ugh mine is exactly the same! Sometimes I know it is for work but he has both a work phone and personal phone. It got to the point that I felt so neglected that I told him, once you come upstairs after work when your invoicing and all that jazz is complete you have to turn the thing off. At first he disagreed so I started secretly snap chatting him when he was doing it and sending it every time, now he understands and turns it off. Much happier haha

  • I’m afraid l am guilty of doing this too!if l was in your shoes l would ask him what l had just said to see if he was listening my husband does this to me! eventually he’ll realize he should put the phone down!

  • I know exactly how you feel. When hubby does the dishes, he’s watching Netflix. When hubby sits down at meal time, he’s busy catching up on his forums. With bubba two on the way he’ll have to change his habits. My tip would be to discuss the topic openly, honestly and have a no phone zone. In my case I would start this phone free zone at the dinner table.
    Good luck mumma!

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