19 Answers

I would really like another child as my daughter has just turned 3 but I fear I am going to be judged.. I always wanted to children a few years apart from each other I know I can do it on my own I’m just going to get judged if I go through with it. Any advice??


Posted by shelley shelley, 1st April 2015


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  • Do what make you and your bubs happy!
    You don’t owe anyone and explanation for wanting another child.


  • As long as you are capable financially, mentally and physically to look after another child on your own, go for it. There’s always someone who will judge you for whatever you do


  • When you say you know you can do it on your own, are you thinking IVF to have the baby or asking someone to help you fall pregnant and then go away? The raising you can do on your own, the making is a whole other story. If it is a known donor, you’ll have to think about whether they may want to be in the child’s life at some point even though you want to go it alone and if you choose anonymous, you’ll have to think about when the child is older, them asking who their father is/was etc. It’s not just about having a “baby”, its about having a new little human being who will one day grow up to be an adult with questions and having a child is never just about you. Big things to take into consideration before going ahead. As for the judging, screw others, worry about your own direct family and what it will mean to them.


  • Does it matter if you get judged, as long as you are doing what you want and are doing it well? As long as you’re not sitting on welfare let the rest of us support you, not being a good role model to your kids, go for it


  • Your heart will always lead you to the right decision. Only you know what’s best for you and your family, nobody else has the right to pass judgement


  • if you think its right…….. it is ! our heart always knows whats right…


  • Whatever you choose in life, someone somewhere will judge for whatever reason. So don’t listen the judges and the doubters and the haters. Follow your heart and your dreams, if you think you can do it, then do it!


  • You need to do what is right for you, not anybody else. It is your life to be lived.


  • Yes you have to do what makes you happy! :)


  • i always wanted my children a few years apart but my girls are 4.5 yrs apart and my youngest is almost 4. i would love another but for me the time is just not right. maybe you should write a list of the pros and cons..


  • No matter what you do in life, someone will judge, someone will say something thoughtless and hurtful and someone will always make sure you know they aren’t happy with your life choices. I would suggest it’s up to you what you can handle in life. 2 children on your own is a lot to manage. A friend of mone had her daughter young and searched for love for years, she stopped looking and found mr right, had another 2 children – guess you have to think long term as well


  • i don’t know. it is your life. i would wait till i was married to have a child BUT that is me. I don’t know your situation. If you can take on the responsibility, do it if it will make you happy but i believe that a child should have both parents there. I am old school lol


  • I’m in a very similar situation. But extremely depressed and lonely. Thanx girls for all the above advice!


  • If you can manage financially then go for it. People judge everything. Do what makes you happy


  • I wouldn’t worry about what others think, it is your life after all. Do what feels right to you & your little family, if that means making it a little bit larger than go for it.


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