Hello!

My daughter is due to have surgery and can’t lift her kids for 2 weeks so I will help look after them. My partner is upset saying why can’t the father look after them and that I have a life. I am just helping my daughter out why does he take offence to this?


Want more real mum questions sent to you?

You'll need to check this email to complete your signup.
  • Sounds like he is jealous that you are helping your daughter and he is being unreasonable about it of course you want to help with your grandchildren and your daughter.


  • Who knows? I think they’re a bit jealous and also a bit immature to not see things for what they truly are


  • Same issue with my partner. He doesn’t want to travel interstate to visit our son and his family, yet he also doesn’t want me to do it. The few times I have gone, he’s been fine to start with, then gets in a mood days after I’ve left. He refuses to answer the phone, pretends he won’t pick me up at the airport etc. It’s really hard to deal with, but won’t stop me, I think if he keeps doing it…..I’ll end up staying and not coming home!


  • My partner is the same. In my instance, I think it’s just plain jealousy. He does not like me spending time with my son and grandson and all I can attribute it to is jealousy. There’s no other reason. I don’t work and have no other commitments. We have a dog and that’s it


  • yeah ask him. or maybe explain what is exactly going on. some men only listen to half of it lol.


  • Why don’t you ask him ? Maybe he thinks 2 weeks is too long , but if that was my daughter I would help out too especially if I have no other major responsibilities to attend to .


  • I would suggest you do what you feel is right, without letting anyone take advantage of you.


  • That depends on why the hubby isn’t helping out? Is it because he’s lazy? Or other commitments? You are a lovely mum for wanting to help out, maybe hubby is jealous he won’t get so much of your time?


  • I would like to hope that if he were able to the father would help out more.
    Perhaps he can not get time off work, or works interstate.
    I think it is wonderful that you’re helping your daughter out, your partner may just be worried you’re taking on a bit to much.
    You need to address this with your partner before your grandchildren arrive. It is going to be hard enough for them with their Mum being unwell, they don’t need to feel tension between you & your partner at the same time.
    Talk it through with your partner & I hope he comes around & is a bit nicer about the situation.
    Best of luck.


  • Maybe he feels like you are being taken advantage of, if the father is not helping.
    There is nothing wrong with you helping your daughter though


  • Her partner can and should support her through this surgery and as her Mum you want to support her too. There is nothing wrong with a Mum wanting to support a daughter. It is a loving thing to do.


Post your reply
Add a photo
Your MoM account


Lost your password?

Enter your email and a password below to post your answer and join MoM:

↥ Back to top

Thanks For Your Star Rating!

Would you like to add a written rating or just a star rating?

Write A Rating Just A Star Rating
Join