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24 Answers

What do I do? My tween has ADHD. She still can’t do her own shoe laces, make her bed, make breakfast or anything really. I have a 4yr old that does a whole lot more though I don’t let her know I know that as I don’t want to break the fantastic spirit she has & I feel she is an indigo child. Please help as she cries when I take her to school clinging still at me & needs light on all night as well as not hygienic enough as in wiping when using bathroom or washing hands. I also brush her teeth & put her clothes away. She is in year 5 at school & it scares me to think high school is around the corner . Help any suggestions please.


Posted by amberohlson, 21st February 2014


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  • gee my kids dont do that either and their at school.


  • The support group is a really good idea


  • I agree with nini routine and patience is the key


  • Routine and patience. I think also let her know that she has a condition but in a positive way – ‘you might not be able to concentrate at all times but look what a kind person you are’ – it’s hard for her to work On her problems if she’s not being told. Also when she finds out later she might think that you were embarrassed and tried to hide it. My nephew hads quite severe ADHD , it’s been a battle to learn thongs like reading or maths but he was fantastic at sports and that was what my sister always highlighted – that you don’t get this good at something without something else being ‘balanced out’ – so try to make her proud of being different!


  • Hi I also have one child with ADD and the other with ADHD the oldest one is go on 18 years of age and he still leaves his suff around but I’ve notice when i raise my voice they all ways seam to listen and the youngest one is very sensitive and he’s 16 years of age theirs got to and consequences but most importantly a routine is vital with children with this disability, I’m sorry if I sound harsh , but you may be able to write down a routine as to what they have to do when I get up in the morning and don’t for get to praise then and show love affection and always try your best to be patient as these children have p difficulty when remembering and focusing there are times when you had to repeatedly show them time after time what you want them to do , she will eventually pick it up , my 16 year old I’m constantly repeating myself but in a calm and comforting manner he’s getting their slowly , and as I mentioned the boys ages they still sleep with the bathroom light on ,


  • I would try and go to a support group and see how others cope with children of the same age and condition


  • ADHD kids can learn normal behaviours (I have a son who has severe ADHD) its just harder and you have to put a lot of extra work in with them. shoelaces for some reason are the worse thing so maybe velcro on shoes, but as for bathroom behaviours that can be learnt, are you sure there is no bullying at school, children quickly learn to wind up an ADHD child. Also look at diet and make sure you reduce sugars and additvies.


  • I have ADHD myself but i don’t expect my 12yo daughter to make her bed or her breakfast and She does sleep with the light on – its just we turn it off when she is fast asleep. I do these little things as i do them for my younger ones, whom are 7yo & 5yo – they have years ahead to do it for themselfs. As for tooth brush maybe get her an electric one with those songs on it (there is a Selina Gomez one – round and round). Let your daughter pick out one of those antibacterial foam soaps – make sure she likes the smell as it will remind her ( children can get forgetfull so i always ask my kids to smell their hands and if it doesn’t smell of the soap than its not washed! ). Clothes – simple…hangers are the magical for school uniforms, tees, pants, dresses and skirts (put a peg on the skirts and pants) this way she’ll be able to find stuff and not have it stuffed in a draw.
    School try to figure out what at school is bugging her…maybe she is being bulled or picked on and hasnt said anything to you, does she come home happy she has finnished school for the day than its a possible as it happend to me. If not, look at showing her the positives of school – If she loves art talk to her about taking her pens and pencils out at playtime and drawing ect or maybe its sports or seeing her friends, just talk it up not matter how many times you’ve said it before she might just be looking for some reassurance from you.


  • Depending where you live there are many centers available Delta Clinic Castle Hill NSW offer help for the whole family. Look into a product called Synaptol a Natural Medicine Formulated to Relieve Inattentiveness and Hyperactivity and Support Your Balanced, Healthy Lifestyle as an alternative to the drugs doctors promote.
    Homeopathic medicines are gentle. When you have a calm daughter then you can re teach some learned behavior and have some normal daily functions. Always make it fun learn by play. I once wrote a play and had my kids do the actions and from then on they had picked up the skills I wanted to teach them with out it looking like a task they had to learn. Have races and a reward at the end, that might be a trip to the shops or a movie night at home, just make it fun.


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