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At what age should pocket money cease? And what should older kids do to earn the pocket money? My partner and my issue is that we have 2 adult kids living at home. A 20 year old daughter, doing 2 degrees and working part-time and an 18 year old son who has just finished year 12 with no plans for future study and no job. I feel that as neither pays board they should do some basic chores like feeding the pets, doing the dishes and a load of laundry every so often with no payment. We pay health insurance, all medical bills, sports fees and help out with uni books and some clothing. I cook 90% of the meals. Hubby still pays them pocket money!! What do other parents think?


Posted anonymously, 6th June 2021


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  • Nope. no. ahuh. I lived at home until I was 25, but as soon as I graduated highschool, I paid board, I cooked at least 2 nights a week, and I can tell you, there was no pocket money coming my way.


  • If they still live with you they should be chip in for living expenses


  • This is such an individual dilemma. It depends on how much they earn, what they do around the house and how much they need to devote time to study. We always intended to support our children while they study – then once they hit the workforce. They can contribute financially.


  • While they are living at home they should be doing chores to help out, the son especially. Since your daughter is still studying and doing part time work, she could do the washing and cook some of the meals when not studying. Your son should be doing a lot more since he’s finished his studies and not looking for work he could mow the lawns, feed the pets and walk the dog (if you have one), mow the lawn, help with the dishes and do a load or two of washing. I don’t agree on them getting pocket money especially since everything is paid for them. If your husband is willing to give them pocket money for doing nothing he is setting them up to expect everything for nothing. Wonder if he’s going to pay their rent and buy their food if they move out?


  • No. I think they are old enough to think about family situation. You will need talk to them they are not school kids any more.


  • No no no they are both way too old for ” pocket money” .Both ought to help around the house for free food and board at their age.Get jobs!!!


  • Absolutely not! Pocket money is for when you are too young to earn your own money, and should still be regarded as something you earn by doing chores, not expect as a freebie. Once you are an adult , adios pocket money, welcome to the real world! If you are studying then fair enough, you may not be able to financially contribute or pay your way but you should def be doing chores. For the son who has finished school with no plans and no job, giving him pocket money will only prolong the procrastination. Withdraw all service and cash asap!


  • So I can confirm that until recently my hubby was still “accidentally” paying our 20 year old son his pocket money. We started it back many years ago before he started any form of part-time work and then let it continue until he took on a full-time job. However, my hubby cancelled it over the phone with the bank only for us to learn a couple of weeks ago that it had not happened online or in the correct part of the system. Our son cheekily confirmed he knew!!! And we have since cut it off.


  • I think a sit down and a big chat is in order – you and your husband need to be on the same page, and your expectations of the children need to be crystal clear. 20 is way to old – especially if they do nothing to help around the house. At that age you shouldn’t even have to ask for their help , let alone pay for it


  • Time to earn their own money, way too old for pocket money and they should be helping around the house and not for money.


  • They should of started when they were younger helping around the house, so you might have a bit of resistance but you have to get them to help and your son has got to get a job as he needs to start paying board same as your daughter and they don’t get anymore pocket money from now on as they are old enough to pay their way and not be freeloaders anymore. Your daughter can do her own washing and ironing if she has any she needs to be able to do her own as she is old enough now. Your son can help with the dishes and feed the dogs and make sure they have water and pick up the dog poo.


  • NO you do enough for them


  • A big NO. I stopped getting allowance when I got a job at the local fish and chip shop at 14. If I continued to get allowance I think I would have become greedy, privileged and expected too much from my parents. Your daughters job is sufficient for her situation and tell your son to start earning his own money.


  • If they can’t pay board they should be doing the work. Definitely. Our daughter actually was working part time at 18, having finished her Diploma in Early Childhood Education in an accelerated program through a private college, and whilst we were still paying for doctors, medicine, etc as her wage was small to begin with, she paid a small amount of board and did jobs to help around the house. When she got a full time job she paid more money and her share of the electricity, water, etc. There was no pocket money once she was an adult. Jobs around the house were in place of or a supplement to board payment.


  • That’s absolutely crazy. I went to uni and still was able to have a job at Domino’s. If they want money they need to earn it and if not paying board they definitely need to do some chores! You’re giving them enough buy not charging board.


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