Hello!

My seven year old has trouble making friends
She constantly asks for attention to the point where I’m hugging her all day and it doesn’t even help
She fets bullied and dirsnt seem to play well with others


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  • Look into speech pathologists in your local area and ask if they run social skills groups. Will be tailored to teaching her how to make friends, how to be social and how to understand social dynamics.


  • Perhaps she needs to build her confidence. One way is to do some sort of kids theatre group where they do all sorts of fun activities and help build kids confidence and resilience though special programs. could be worth looking into.


  • Making new friends seems to get harder and harder as each year passes.
    Perhaps speak to the school & see if they do a buddy system?
    A few years ago my sister had a similar problem & the school were a great support & organized a girl in her class to sit with her & 4 years later they are still the best of friends!
    The bullying should not be tolerated, definitely bring that up with the school & hopefully they resolve the issue quickly. Clearly your daughter is getting a lot of love at home, hopefully a solution can be met with the school before it deters your daughter from wanting to attend.
    Best of luck!


  • It’s often harder for us as parents when our kids face problem at school particularly regarding friends and bullying so I definetly can relate to your concerns. I would speak to your child’s class teacher and also speak to the school councellor and tell them to keep an eye out. I definetly would speak to principle regarding bullying because the last thing you want is your child to be put off school because of these issues. Good luck.


  • My sons pshycologist encouraged my son to go up to one different kid a week in his class and ask if he could play with them.. Small steps remember dont rush this this too over one school term to really happen … We had a chart at home and each week or so he came home with a new name and got a sticker on it… Once he reached 5 names he got a reward ( of his affordable choice he chose KFC for tea). We gave up once that chart was completed as he now has up to 5 friends he plays with everyday, we couldnt be happier…


  • It may be worthwhile looking into private speech pathologists in your area. Some of the private practices hold group social skill classes in the holidays which address the issues you have mentioned. Public speech pathologists would also be able to help but would provide 1:1 input on social skills.


  • Some kids take longer than others to make connections. I would be patient and just encourage him as best you can.


  • Talk to his class teacher and make he / she aware of this. They will access the situation to see what happens in class and have extra class friendship talks / partner activities etc. Follow up with the teacher to get their updates for any future improvement. Hope this helps.


  • My daughter struggled to make friends as well, she went through a few years of some nasty girls being really mean to her and the teacher told me she was ostracised because she says and acts what she feels (which broke my heart as well) Now she has learnt how to conform to a certain extent and has some really great friends who accept her for who she is. I never wanted to break her spirit because that is what will get her far in life and its what makes her unique :)


  • Try organizing a few play dates with one or two children and see if getting to know someone outside the classroom helps. Does she have any interests? Perhaps encourage her to take up something outside school – I think orienteering is a good option since it can be done as groups (parent and child) and as the child feels more confident they can go in pairs with another child and get to know them, and there can be lots of socializing before and after, so a good sport for the more “introverted” that nevertheless involves lots of socialization, in which you can be involved if she still needs/wants that, before transitioning to peers.


  • I remember going to a parent teacher meeting when my son was this age. The teacher told me my son was quite happy wandering round the playground, on the outer, watching the other kids play. It broke my heart, how could the teacher believe this? It wasn’t long before he made friends tho and those closest to him are still his best mates at age 25. It took him a while to make friends, but when he did, they were fantastic friends :)


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