92 Answers

My husband blames me for almost everything – what should I do? It is driving me insane.

Posted by anon, 11/7/2013

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  • its a tricky situation… you’ll have to handle very maturely…sit with him and talk about it and nothing else…dont bring past issues in the conversation….

  • He is male and cannot take responsibility for his own failings, it is a male problem and not something that you can really do anything about, other that counselling which would be a good idea as it is something that is obviously affecting you and your happiness and will undermine your relationship if not resolved.

  • because he cant take responsibility for himself. weak

  • If you’ve got kids, I’d see if one of the in-laws can take them for dinner and a sleep-over. Plan it ahead of time, and o.k., you may be the one who has to plan and cook dinner, so it won’t be relaxing for you. But sometimes the old saying “Softy, softly, catchee monkey” is the way to go. A nice meal of food that he really likes, with perhaps a drink or two, and you’ll both be more relaxed and hopefully in to mood to talk. And no kids around to interrupt or need attention. Then you can carefully ask whether anything’s bothering him, is there something you can do to help, etc. etc. You’ll know what to say, and hopefully he’ll appreciate the effort you’ve gone to, and you can talk things over. As tempting as it might be, try not to say “You make me feel like ….” and “You’re always …”, which he may well see as accusing him (even if it is justified). More roundabout comments like “I’ve noticed that you seem stressed about something. Is there anything I can do to help?” type of thing. Good luck, I hope you get to the bottom of what’s bothering him.

  • Sounds insecure. I would seek professional help for your own sake and sanity. Have you told him how this makes you feel?

  • Ask him why does he blame you for everything ? simple and upfront

  • A marriage councillor could help best of Luck

  • Sounds like a selfish man who can’t take responsibility.

  • Hope you manage to work things out with him :)

  • Dont they all. Discuss and be upfront on how you feel when he does it.

  • Me to I think communication is the key. Let him know you are feeling horrible.

  • I think communication is key here. Most men don’t know how to express the way they’re feeling the way we can so easily do. I know my hubby is not a talker and will bottle everything up and then I’ll feel like hes taking things out on me when really hes not, hes just grumpy at everything! Maybe talk to him and see if you can get him to open up about the way he’s feeling.

  • Mine does this occasionally. Its usually a sign he’s really stressed and unhappy with work etc. I find if I stop and ask him nice questions about things so he doesn’t feel ignored in favour of all the baby stuff, things get better.

  • Is there some sort of communication breakdown? maybe chat to him about this.

  • Things change so much when you have kids. He may be stressed or tired let him know his you feel.

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