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A mother-of-six has insisted she isn’t a ‘bad mum’ she is an “honest mother”, for admitting she regrets having her youngest twin boys.

The Daily Mail published a story about an Irish mother who says she regretted not aborting her twin boys.

In 2008, Jeanna Measom was 42 and already a mum of four. She had been breastfeeding her youngest so was not using contraception, especially as she had struggled to fall pregnant with her fourth child.

When she discovered she was expecting again, Jeanne was stunned.

“I Honestly Regretted Having Them”

The twins are now nine years old, but she says ‘’“I love them – of course I do. But there were days when they were younger that I honestly regretted having them.

“That might make me sound like a bad mum. I beg to differ. I’m an honest mother and the truth that no parent of multiples likes to admit is this: having twins is unrelentingly hard work.”

When she realised she was pregnant with twins she had thought about terminating the twins but “A scan at the hospital showed I was six weeks pregnant.”

“While it was early enough to terminate the pregnancy – I realised that I couldn’t go through with it.

“Guy (her husband) agreed. His rationale was simple – what’s one more when you’ve already got four?” A trigger for the thoughts was also finding out that she was having twins, as she could not ” imagine how I was going to get the older kids to school with a toddler and baby twins in tow.”

Traumatised and Clueless

She said she cried for weeks and got advice from a friend with twins but the pregnancy continued and when she gave birth ‘’“I remember staring at them traumatised and utterly clueless as to how I’d cope with them.”

“One night when they were ten days old, I stood watching them both finally sleeping at the same time,” she recalled.

“Instead of the warm fuzzy feeling of love and pride, I’d felt with my other children, regret burnt inside me.

“I asked myself what had I done. Had I made the wrong choice in not terminating the pregnancy? I felt guilty for even thinking it.”

She kept expecting the warm and fuzzy feelings to come, but they never came “With my other kids I took endless pictures of them at every stage, but the Twins’ gummy smiles failed to melt my heart,” she said.

“I realised there was just no time for that same emotional attachment.

“I didn’t even give them the luxury of a bath for the first year.

I Was Exhausted

“I was so exhausted, a clean down with wet wipes sufficed.

“When their nappy was changed, their face got a wash – that was it.”

Housework went by the wayside, homework was finished with the constant sound of the twins crying and meal times were functional at best.

‘When they started to become more mobile, I was so exhausted, I struggled to keep up with them.

Dark Thoughts….

‘Around their first birthday, I sat in the car with them, listening to both of them wailing and thinking I can’t do this any more.

‘Staring at them in the rear-view mirror dark thoughts rushed through my mind: I could give them up for adoption, or I could kill us all….

‘They were just fleeting thoughts – thankfully. But I felt like I was drowning. I desperately needed help.’

Wise Words

Jeanne has strong words of advice for mums-to-be who have just found out they are having twins – get as much help as you can from the second they arrive.

‘Rowan and Jude are nine now. I love them – of course I do. But there were days when they were younger that I honestly regretted having them.

‘That might make me sound like a bad mum. I beg to differ.

‘I’m an honest mother and the truth that no parent of multiples likes to admit is this: having twins is unrelentingly hard work.’

Share your comments below.

Image via Daily Mail

  • A brave lady for being so honest

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  • It frankly sounds like she needed a lot more help.

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  • PND can impact on mothers with single or multiple births. The key is to get help as soon as possible.

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  • I can’t imagine having twins let alone 6 kids too but while I usually applaud honesty no matter how true it is no child should read their parent/parents thought this about them.

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  • I don’t even have multiples and can relate.

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  • Yep, can relate. Parenting is hard. Although you might think that in your darkest moments … some things are better left unsaid

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  • She’s tired and will regret saying that.

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  • it would have been tremendously hard,just having twins as your first children would be hard let alone having four children already.You are being honest and im sure that anyone in your situation would have had similar thoughts at times.Getting help is extremely important, if you had been able to get more help you could have gotten more rest for yourself you may have felt a little differently and enjoyed more moments.

    Reply

  • I know the struggle of bring up four single children under the age of 7, just couldn’t imagine having twins at that stage. And yes, I agree that you should ask for help as soon as you can in that situation, but if it had happened to me, there would have been no-where to turn. Had just moved to a country town with my four, husband was still in the big smoke, parents were overseas, and I knew no-one. Sometimes it’s not so easy to get help.
    Hopefully this mum may have some closure for her feelings now that she has admitted them, and I don’t think her a bad mum, just an extremely honest one.

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  • She may regret saying this so publicly, but its not wrong to be honest.

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  • The title is a bit like click bait.
    She’s just being very honest about how she felt, I’m sure a LOT of parents have the “what was I thinking” moment, especially when they bring their first baby home, let alone their 5th and 6th!

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  • I have two kids and sometimes I feel struggles just having two. I could not imagine how emotionally and physically drained she must have been.

    I hope now that they have managed to bond overtime and that their little smiles melt her heart now.

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  • I think it’s sad that she felt this way. She must have really struggled. poor lady. I can’t imagine coping with 6 kids

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  • An overwhelmed, burned out mommy who absolutely could have done with help with her kids and in her house !! Bless her !

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  • I think it’s important to ask for help. Most people would understand her situation and be happy to help out.

    Reply

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