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Constance Hall is a well known Aussie blogger. We love her for her complete honesty and sometimes brutal references to the everyday parenting.

Constance today shared something that really struck a cord. She wants people to know kindness needs to become cool. NOT bullying or meanness.

She writes, “I’m trying to teach my kids that kindness is cool.

They say that kids receive more social recognition for negative behaviours, bullying and meanness gives them a social boost, makes them appear powerful.

Power, winning, competition are glorified and Bullying is a desperate attempt at gaining a piece of that pie.

No wonder we have no control over the bullying crisis.

Recently I have come to the conclusion that we are all raising potential bullies, we are always discussing how to prevent our kids from being bullied but never really discussing the likely event that our kids could be the bullies.

I have seen it, my kind little girl, in a group, wanting to be accepted, one girl gets laughed at, my daughters eyes dart back and forth at who’s laughing, the girls she wanted to impress, so she laughs too.

It’s that easy.
They think MEANNESS is COOL.

Tomorrow instead of reminding Billie-Violet to ignore any bullies at school I am asking her to do one kind thing for a child that she doesn’t usually play with at school.

And I am giving her 2 Freddo frogs, one for her and one to hand to a the kindest kid in her class.
I have to bribe them to do everything else in this life, kindness is no exception.

I want my children to glorify kindness.

Because Kindness is COOL. ” #kindnessiscool

Well said, Con!

This struck a cord with me after a recent conversation with my twelve year old son who was explaining how some of the “bullies” at school get away with their behaviour because all the bystanders think it is one big joke and stand around laughing and cheering them on. NOT ACCEPTABLE!

We need to teach our kids that this behaviour is never OK, we need them to know that the first reaction should always be kindness and protection of our mates and siblings. NOT constant meanness and bullying.

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  • It has become the cool thing to be mean. Put down humour is not funny. Being kind is what is needed.

    Reply

  • I agree with Constance.
    Very well said

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  • Good on you Constance ! May all our kids discover how cool it is to be kind !!

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  • I would be getting ready for the other kids to gang up because they aren’t receiving a treat. They could either gang up onr one or both kids.

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  • I don’t believe children should be bribed to do the right thing. Doing the right thing is reward in itself. If everyone does the right/kind thing, bullies become powerless.

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  • I often ask my kids to tell me about “something nice” they did for someone today. Even if it’s small, it counts.

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  • Constance Hall is a twit. But, she has a point here.

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  • Surely a very important message to pass to our kids!

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  • Good on Constance,she is definitely sending the right message out there!

    Reply

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