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You think you’re a cr*p housewife! Some of these mums will have you in fits of laughter.

Check out some of the most hilarious CR*P housewife moments EVER!

– “My husband can’t believe how many pans I’ve ruined by letting the potatoes boil dry!”

– “One of my best #craphousewife moments is when I accidentally washed my DH’s white chefs jackets with a dark blue t-shirt. His uniforms ended up with a tie-dye type pattern on them!”

– “Baking in a springform tin, the base wasn’t firmly clipped in; the batter leaked. Removing the tin, the tea towel caught fire. A friend attacked the CAKE with a fire extinguisher. I had a flat, small cake which tasted of extinguisher foam, and a tea towel with holes in it.”

– “When I popped to the shops last night for bread and got home to find I left the bag of groceries at the shop!”

- “Oh I have so many of them… best one was when we were first married and hubby was going back to work asked me to make his lunch (Ha) well of course we only hade plastic wrapped cheese and ooopppssss it was on the sandwich when he went to eat it at lunch time… thank goodness it wasn’t being toasted.”

– “I let my son clean the old fridge freezer and he blew it up so we had to buy another fridge, maybe should have told him not to use a knife. Doesn’t always pay to have the kids help with the housework.”

– “I refuse to wash the boys’ toilet because they can’t aim properly anyway, I don’t bother to make the beds in the morning because it’ll get used in the night again, no need to tidy up a messy house because houses with kids are messy anyway.”

– “Has to be the joke of our house hold how many times I have flooded the laundry sink by not removing things I had soaking in the tub before putting the machine on.”

– “I was cooking dinner in my electric frypan and accidentally pushed it off the bench, tipping it all over the floor!”

– “When the door to the storeroom in my old house could barely open as I just kept shoving everything in there to get it out of sight.”

– “My crap house wife moment was went I’d had such a massive day with the kids and needed to scrub the shower but had no scrubbers so used steel wool instead and ended up scrubbing all the sealant off. Hubby wasn’t happy at all but forgave me.”

– “My son begged and begged me to make corn flake cookies.. He was so excited.. Until I burnt them. I’m able to burn water I’m that awesome.”

– “Ironing his best trousers and actually managing to somehow melt them.”

– “Finding out I used salt instead of caster sugar in a chocolate cake recipe when the kids licked the bowl! No way did I believe them it was YUCK!”

– “I’m hopeless at sewing and so when my son needed his school shorts taken in at the waist, I simply pinched either side of the waist band and put in a few staples. He looked like he had wings on his pants but luckily his shirt covered them.”

– “I recently purchased new jeggings in dark blue colour. On wash day I threw these in with the dark clothes cycle and I had a few whites which I thought would be okay to throw in. But being new the colour ran turning the whites purple.”

So do you think you deserve a CR*P housewife award?

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  • I’m not too crash hot. My cooking is very hit and miss. My house cleaning is very similar. I have my priorities, kids come first, so I’m not the best housewife

    Reply

  • Ummm where do I start – I’m a daily achiever.

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  • This lovely woman makes me laugh. Good to see her face.

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  • Ha yep I’ve done a number of those. I once went almost 12 months with colour coded tees, undies, socks and stitching on various items because I failed to notice the red Christmas tea towel I’d scooped up with my clothes. Finally the pink faded….and I added some new clothes in there.

    Reply

  • I did when I was first married and had to make spaghetti – I boiled the pasta to the directions and then used a full 32oz can of tomato paste on it – that was all – I couldn’t eat it but my new husband did and then proceeded to cook the pasta himself for a while till I learned what really went into a spaghetti bolognaise!

    Reply

  • Haha some funny and relatable stories mentioned here

    Reply

  • I don’t have the time or inclination to be anything more then a crap housewife. Life is way too short to worry about these things

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  • This makes me feel much better about my housewife skills.

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  • I won one of these books. I was super excited…but i did ask my friends – should i be excited by this win, or should i be worried that i had one of the best (worst!) crap housewife moments when there were over 350 entries! I did love reading all the other entries – makes me feel not so alone in the world :) Can’t wait for the book to arrive.

    Reply

  • Cooking Pea and Ham Soup in a Pressure Cooker and it blew the seal. Soup went up onto the ceiling. My Mum was very sick and my Aunty decided to come to mind us and cook a large meal which needed plain flour in it. Mum knew where jars of various foods were in different cupboards but didn’t have them labelled. My Aunty tried to make gravy…and put custard powder in it. It tasted yucky but it was edible. We kids weren’t old enough to be using a stove. There was often discussions and plenty of laughs about it for a long time though. The Dr. had put my Mum on a new medication that they usually admit patients to hospital for. It was for chronic Dermatitis as creams didn’t work on hers because of numerous allergies. Dad had just had surgery and was still in hospital.

    Reply

  • I have a sachet of colour run in my laundry permanently for issues within the laundry.

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  • I remember well before I was married, probably when I was around 18-19yrs old, the first time I cooked with capsicum. I used the entire capsicum, including stem and seeds ;D

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  • I’ve done a few of those shared…and rice using a pot makes for a ruined pot. I do it in the microwave now haha

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  • Mines the rice pan, burnt more than I can remember

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  • Haha have experienced a few of these myself! Glad to see I’m not the only daft one!

    Reply

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