A pregnant mum has shared her story on online explaining why she won’t tell hubby when baby number two is booked in for delivery via c-section.

The mum shares on Mumsnet, “For background, [I] went into spontaneous labour with DS1 (dear son 1) and MIL (mother-in-law) (despite multiple previous conversations) ignored my request to stay away from hospital and visit when home.”

“She continually interrupted my labour for updates from DH and he didn’t have the backbone to tell her to go home,” she says.

The expectant mother has confessed she isn’t telling her husband the exact due date of baby number two to avoid her mother-in-law finding out about it.

She says she can’t trust her husband not to “blab” to his mum and she wants to avoid a repeat of what happened when she gave birth to their first child.

She says she plans to tell her husband about the birth the day of the c-section and understands this will make it difficult for him to get time off work.

“I plan to tell him the morning I go into hospital – he will just have to cancel work for two weeks (just as if I went into natural labour) and take his phone off him too – to avoid MIL being told, and give me the peace, respect and joy that I want (and feel I deserve) for what may be my last birth experience.”

Most followers on the forum feel she is actually making a mistake by not informing her husband of the due date.

mumsnet

DO you think she is doing the wrong thing? What would you do? Share your comments below


  • I understand that the mother in laws intrusion is totally unacceptable, especially during labour. I personally didn’t have anyone waiting at the hospital and nobody bothered us during either labour. But not telling your husband the date of the c-section is wrong, in that you are saying you don’t trust him. I get that he wouldn’t know if you went into labour naturally until it was happening , but because you know you really ought to let him in on it too. Just have a proper conversation with your husband and say you want to surprise the family with the birth announcement, to soften the blow of keep your mouth shut to your mother!


    • That’s the problem, he can’t keep his mouth shut as far as his mum goes (he’s gutless), and that’s why she doesn’t trust him, and I don’t blame her. She should be able to have this baby without her mil there. It’s not as if she’s going to keep her hubby away from the birth, just his mum.

    Reply


  • I find it hard to imagine not telling my husband something so important, but I can understand wanting MIL to butt out.

    Reply


  • If MIL can’t stay away then I guess people have to resort to these sorts of things.

    Reply


  • Personally all these subterfuges seem a little childish to me. Just tell what you want and need to the mother in law. What if there is an emergency at work and the husband can’t take time off? Is it worth the risk?

    Reply


  • Joke will be on her no date is ever set in stone, baby comes when baby is ready and secondly drs can and will change the date to suit themselves

    Reply


  • Wow ! I am shocked but I understand why you’re not going to tell him in advance. Can you arrange in advance for somebody trustworthy to mind your son a couple one day stays on that day “so you can have a break” before minding him the day you are having your baby? The first visit after the birth of your baby should be your mother not your mother-in-law.

    Reply

Post a comment
Like Facebook page

LIKE MoM on Facebook

Please enter your comment below
Would you like to include a photo?

No picture uploaded yet
Please wait to see your image preview here before hitting the submit button.

Your MoM account

Lost your password?

Enter your email and a password below to post your comment and join MoM:

Loading articles…
↥ Back to top

Thanks For Your Star Rating!

Would you like to add a written rating or just submit?

Write A Rating Just Submit
Join