I see this is a rather old question. How is the situation now ?

Come up with ground rules and try to continue the normal routines as much as possible. Good luck.

I have no expereince in this. so sorry i cannot be much help

there are some good comments here

I’m sure she will be fine.

We do shared care with my step sons (%50 time at each house) and it works well, even on school nights.

You can always discuss with legal Aid who could advise on the documentation aspect

Some good answers – I hope it works out and not to worry about it too much.

i hope its worked out?

They learn to adapt, but if its really concerning you. Please try and work something out that works for all of you. Goodluck

Good luck with what ever you decide

Really good answers here, hope some are helpful

dont think about the future, think and live now..she will be fine and as she gets older she will understand the different rules etc

if it is not a problem now then it should not be a problem later. just make sure they have 2 sets of everything so you are both organised ie uniform etc.

Kids adapt- i would be more worried about ensuring she has a good sleeping routine.

Some lovely supportive answers here.

Be careful, when i asked my niece why she was always unsettled after her dads she said it was because she wanted to live with daddy and not mummy(shes 6 though) but this had happen since she was about 3 -3 1/2 when they spilt up. I think as she gets older or at least hope that they will finally listen to my niece and where she wants to live. When she was little, the mother used to use this unsettled as my brother was not being a good father, boy did she get a shock, to bad shes a nutcase and now is using this as more incentive to keep them away from each other. Not saying this is the case in your situation but sometimes the unsettledness comes from a place you least expect. As for the over nighters in 2 years, I would sit on it, it’s very very possible he won’t have the same job and it’s really not going to hurt to try it and you may find she fits into the routine perfectly. I also can understand why he’s upset, (in his mind) you are threathening his relationship with his daughter about something that isn’t relevant for two years… if i was him I would think you are planning and thinking of anything to make my relationship with my daughter hard.

Kids adapt to their circumstances she will be fine. at some point you have gotten on well with each other things didnt workout however you must do whats right for your little girl and that thats all that really matters.

Perhaps instead of courts making decisions – talk to ex closer to time and work something out – after all at some stage you must have had a relationship that was amicable – dont let you child become a pawn. Build a good relationship with your ex and trust that they will have your child’s best interests at heart too. Kids are adaptable but should not be made to feel bad because mum and dad are warring. My ex used to get kids to school on weekdays, we worked together to ensure kids were not affected by our issues. He is a good caring dad and always did right by them and we trusted each other to do so.

If you are really concerned maybe 50/50 would be better for your daughter.