Hello!

It started when she found out that my son is gifted. He is not gifted in all areas just logic and problem solving which makes him really good at maths. Her daughter is really very good at reading and has a fantastic memory. I started doing the reading with the children this term just 1 day a fortnight and her mother does 3 days a week. I made the mistake of sending her child home with 1 less new book than she thought she should have because her sounding out wasn’t great. I followed the rules as I was given them. Since then this mother has been targeting my son. She makes him re-read books that he is already reading perfectly (he is a good reader but her daughter is much better). I thought that was the end of it but she has now put in a formal complaint to the school that my son is stalking her daughter who is apparently so scared by it that she is having trouble sleeping (however the same girl will happily ask my son to stand next to her in the class line). He girl is actually a bit of a mean girl and often engages in exclusionary behaviour and belittles any children that are struggling academically. I have since been warned by other parents about this bulldozer mum who they all knew about before and have tried to stay off her radar. She has already decided that her child is going to be dux of the school (sadly our children are only in kindergarten) and I am worried that this is all part of a strategy to make my son seem like a bully so that he would be ineligible for any awards that he may earn. My son is confused and starting to get upset because he doesn’t understand why this mother and her daughter are accusing him of things he feels he has not done and feels frustrated that he is being made to re-read books over and over. I know that these are only very mild incidents but I am concerned that this will escalate and I’m not sure how to even approach the situation. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.


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  • It’s actually very sad what example this mum sets to her daughter; like mother like daughter


  • What is the school saying? You definitely need to engage them in addressing this.


  • First I certainly would talk to the teacher and depending on the teachers understanding and support involve the school counselor as well. Wise to keep distance of this mum, don’t start any argument.


  • Sounds a nasty situation and very competitive so early. I’d involve the teachers and explain concerns. Sounds like a good idea to try and focus on ‘getting on skills’ rather than academic success, especially at this age. I hope the school has some ‘citizenship’ awards and ‘friendship’ awards as well as academic? Maybe suggest it if it is so important to you that your son achieves….. Also I’m sure the school must be fed up of ‘stalking’ allegations…. (in reception? I mean.. it is ridiculous…. they will just want her to calm down). I’d try and ignore the allegations and in the big picture re-reading books wont mean your son gets behind. If the school know of the problems perhaps they can do things differently in future years. It may be in their best interests too!


  • Lay it all out for the school. Talk to the school counsellor, too. Make sure your version is heard.


  • Just ignore her. She will move on soon enough.


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