Hello!

“Does anyone have any suggestions for activities we can do or strategies that we can use to teach our 3 year old how to interact appropriately in a group situation? For almost a year now our middle child has been biting other children at childcare. He’s bitten his older brother a few times at home and gets given time out in his room. We thought it was tiredness, so we started putting him to bed earlier (he doesn’t have a day sleep). Two months ago we enrolled him in a 3 year old preschool program with structured activities. He bit a child there, so we told them to send him home next time and he hasn’t repeated it since being sent home. We encourage him to say how he’s feeling rather than get physical and he seemed to be getting it. Then he bit two kids yesterday at childcare. I’ve asked them to send him home next time, but I’m not convinced it will work because for some time I have suspected he doesn’t like it there. When he isn’t being aggressive, he is refusing to join in group activities and won’t sit on the mat for songs or stories, preferring to roam the room. He loves music and knows all the songs, just won’t sit with the other children. It’s disruptive in a structured environment and he needs to get used to it for proper 4 year old Preschool next year. On play dates he often plays alone, but at home he plays with his brother. He will sit and do craft and puzzles, but it seems to be only things he really wants to do. Any ideas would be much appreciated. I’m seriously considering pulling him out of childcare altogether. He was fulltime last year but is only one day a week now.” How do you teach a 3 year old interaction in a group?

Posted by anon, 12/04/13

Want more real mum questions sent to you?

You'll need to check this email to complete your signup.
  • Pulling him out completely will not help it may be he is an Introvert and does not like interaction much but just try to stick with it he needs to learn to be prepared for school. Try talking to him about what he likes and doesn’t like about daycare


  • Most centres have a “biting” policy. I would speak to the director for advice on how to handle it.


  • How did you go with their interaction?


  • How did this go have you used any advice here


  • How is he going now? Has he stopped biting?


  • I hope things have improved for you. I know how frustrating it can be to have a biter. My child grew out of it. If it is still happening I’d suggest having him checked.


  • It’s something u need to work on. Socializing them more. It takes a long time though


  • perhaps it’s something that will just take time.


  • Kids learn so quickly, I wouldn’t worry about needing to be ready for Kindy at this stage, they are equip to help children transition to social readiness for school. That said, biting is a reaction to when children don’t have the words to express their feelings- so spend time talking about feelings and ways to deal with them.


  • I recommend playgroups but if he bites, why has no one bit him back to show how it feels?


  • Seems strange. Maybe invite some friends over so he can play one on one 1st. He might not be able to handle to many people at once. There are kids not saying yours but some who are mildly autistic that cant handle being around lots of people..


  • It sounds he is not feeling secure and confident. I was a group leader for 9 years and found the one day a week kids found it a lot harder to fit in and settle. Can you possibly put him in another day or 2? Then keep encouraging words and phrases to be used when he feels frustrated and not in control. Talk to his teachers about using the same strategies.


  • If you can’t find out from him why he doesn’t want to or if it doesn’t seem right I would have him checked out…


  • I agree with Rick, I think he should be assessed by a suitable professional just to ensure these developmental difficulties aren’t hiding something else. If nothing else, you can rule it out if it’s nothing.


  • take him to play groups they are great


  • Just reading your story, I would to be absolutely honest with you, get him assessed by your GP. Make sure you tell them everything, such as the biting, sitting alone, only wanting to do puzzles etc. There are many areas that they can check by sending you off to the appropriate professionals. It is much better that you address this now, rather than wait for him to start pre-school next year.


  • Lots of I feel sentences and have you asked him why he doesnt want to sit with the other children??


  • Is he communicating ok? Speech wise? If he is feeling he is not being understood he could be reacting this way.


  • As with everything for toddlers, practice makes perfect! Small play dates at your place, short outings to kindergym etc.


  • Maybe in his own environment where he is a little more comfortable invite some kids his age and see how he goes. Being a smaller group will help as he won’t be left out which can happen when there is larger groups.


Post your reply

To post a review/comment please join us or login so we can allocate your points.

↥ Back to top

Thanks For Your Star Rating!

Would you like to add a written rating or just a star rating?

Write A Rating Just A Star Rating
Join