Hello!

This year the local orienteering club has a new location mapped which happens to be a cemetery. They are launching the map on halloween evening with events for individuals and families. However, I’m still trying to get my head around how this will actually feel. Part of me thinks it would be disrespectful to visitors of the cemetery who are mourning loved ones (if there happen to be any there at that time). I’m not sure I would like to come across a load of people jumping over graves, laughing, towing kids around etc. if I was bereaved. While I think there is far more to respect for the dead / and the grieving than just being quiet I can’t decide if this is a ‘no no’ or just some baggage like not talking in a library (which used to be taboo) and in reality any mourners wont mind and the dead can be respected in far deeper ways (like honoring their wishes in life). Any thoughts?


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  • I have a mix of feelings regarding this.
    Firstly people should not be JUMPING over graves at all. That is disrespectful.
    Its more the people who have lost loved ones then those that have passed.
    The reality of it is they are dead and they are not there hanging around the cemetary. Its just a place that people go to mourn them but they arnt there. its those people that you should respect especially for those that have newly lost a loved one.


  • Very disrespectful.


  • Yes definitely disrespectful!


  • I once thought like that about being disrespectful, but I am slowly changing my mind. Many cemeteries, crematoriums, etc. have huge grounds that are not used most of the time and with there being less and less land and areas to use for outings, these are slowly being recognised as a possibility. Recently family friends held their daughter’s wedding in the reception/food area at one of the large cemetery areas in Melbourne and it was well attended an quite dignified and a further way for the area to raise money for the upkeep of the beautiful grounds. So long as the club respects the graves I cannot see it as being detrimental. Often when we travelled around Australia we would happen upon a graveyard and would wander among the headstones reading the names and how long they had managed to live – it was an eye-opener. I guess similar to walking among the graves at the various war cemeteries all over the world when you realise how young were so many who fought for their country. I am sure the club would do the right thing and be respectful.


  • I think it’s unnecessary and disrespectful. I would be suggesting an alternative and complaining about this planned activity


  • In these situations, I find it’s a good measure to put myself in the position of those who are visiting their loved ones grave.
    Show respect for those who are buried there, no running and jumping because tripping and falling could easy happen.
    Maybe choose a small Cemetery that is out a bit further and quieter for this activity.
    At the end you could have a picnic and talk about the who’s, who’s of the cemetery.


  • I think as long as they don’t go climbing on headstones or graves and so some respect it should be fine.


  • I visit my brother, Babas and Gid at the cemetery and I find it an interesting experience with the kids as we like to walk around and read the names and ages and what not of others and we try to picture who they would have been and my children like to express feelings about how a family feels about their loved ones.
    If you’re not actually running around, then I think it’s fine.


  • passing through the cemetary (walking) is ok but running around graves definately not ok.


  • I think this could potentially upset recently bereaved people. I would be more comfortable if they held this sort of thing in the older part of a Cemetary though, one where the graves are too old for there to be recent mourners.


  • Some people would see it that way. I guess it could be if your relative/loved one was in there


  • Personally I don’t think nit is appropriate especially when there will be mourners there visiting loved ones.


  • ‘LOVED ONE’


  • BAGGAGE. it’s not like they’ll be disturbing the deceased and as far as being disrespectful to anyone mourning a loved one in the cemetery, life goes on for the living and I’m yet to see signs in cemeteries that state, no running, talking, laughing, jumping, having fun etc… Some cemeteries are placed near busy roads, are in flight paths with noise, have ghost tour groups and so on because life goes on. If I had a loved in your cemetery, I wouldn’t find a Halloween activity there disrespectful at all. It’s a public place.


  • yes definitely disrespectful


  • I don’t think it is very respectful to do this. I’m glad you are thinking it through. I know I wouldn’t like it happening where any of my loved ones are buried. I think this is a decision that you will make correctly


  • Your question is an interesting one and good on you for weighing up the pros and cons about this issue. In some countries a cemetery is a place where once a year time is taken to ‘celebrate’ and respect the dead such as ‘Day of the Dead’ in Mexico and Memorial Day in the USA. The graves are cleaned and tended to and loved ones remembered.


  • This is terrible and for the people who think it is fine, would you like people climbing over your child’s grave? I bet you wouldn’t and they might think it’s ok these organisers but I don’t show some respect for the dead. This has really upset me thinking about it and maybe the council where they want to do it will lock it or put a guard to stop them.


  • It’s not CEMETARY. It’s not CEMETRY either.
    It’s CEMETERY.
    And it’s just a place where bones rest underground.
    Run, sit, celebrate life in it.
    There’s nothing after this!


  • I dont really agree with this. It does feel abit disrespectful to me.


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