It’s happened to me gradually over the years, I’ve lost many friends just due to not speaking for a long time and never getting invited to anything, mostly because no one does anything anymore. People don’t seem to know how to be lifelong friends anymore. It’s really sad because I’ve lost so many good people.

Nothing wrong with you ! For many years I’ve been an initiator, but lack time myself the last couple years

I can relate to this. I think social media etc has made it a lot harder to connect with people.

It is me too. No one bothers.

I think a lot of people feel this way. It kind of seems like people aren’t open to meeting new people/ making new friends. They’re good with what they have and don’t want more.
I literally helped a fellow mum at school with her sons medication – gave her the run-down of what we did with our son who was in a similar situation. After a few weeks of giving her advice I invited her for coffee and she literally said ‘no, I have enough friends, thanks’. And that was that.
after that little treasure of an experience I kind of gave up putting myself out there.
I do however have a very best friend I’ve had for nearly 30 years….. and I have some great colleagues. I think it’s quality not quantity.

I can relate to this. I don’t have a lot of friends where we live and I feel like I’m always the one messaging the other mum’s suggesting playdates, or suggesting a cuppa or even just to go for a walk when the kids are at school. So often they say ‘oh that’s a great idea’ but nothing ever becomes of it. I get to the point where I give up to a degree because I don’t want to look like I’m begging, or a lost puppy looking for a friend.

I think that, sadly, this is a sign of the times. Everyone is so busy and matching up free times are hard. Just keep trying until you meet the ones that are as keen as you.

I’ve never been part of the “in crowd”. I have some close friends but they’re all from different circles of life and don’t know each other. I am happy with the friends I do have and don’t really have time for more.

I started reflecting on this recently. I feel like since geting older, busier with family etc. I don’t feel like I have as many friends I can just call and hang out with. Sometimes in my mind I feel like it’s too much energy to spend time with people and I think I probably got more introverted over time. It’s great that you are taking initiative though, I think other mums would really appreciate that.

I’ve been feeling exactly the same and wondering if something is wrong with me too and it’s hard as a mum you are so busy yourself but you are making the effort to contact friends & organise catch ups & some people don’t have the courtesy to reply. I think social media has become more important than real Relationships in most people’s lives. Which is very sad

i think most people feel this way, life seems so busy and yet when you think back about what did i do last weekend you can literally say not too much.

I feel like i am always asking and honestly never getting anywhere.

Ive given up chasing friendships, sounds bad.. but i was so sick last year with delta and then omicron recently – i cant be bothered chasing – ill take my family any day, i have found my health and family are much more important than people who also dont reach out to you.

I feel this too. I find it hard to make friends.

As a new mom, it’s hard to make the time – I want to do all these things but I haven’t found a solid balance with play dates and keeping ontop of house work and nap times and all that. I’m sure other new moms are similar

I think people are just busy with their families and lives. It’s hard enough trying to get housework and stuff done while looking after the kids.
If you’re working as well then that’s more time out of your day.
I find it hard and I only work three days but the other two are kids activities like dancing and swimming but I do try and make time for play dates with other kids as my kids love to socialise but don’t go to daycare so whenever I can I try and organise for them to do stuff with other kids.

I also struggle with this. Happy to have a sister that I get along with so well because she’s all I really need for a friend.

Not just you, I find it really hard to make friends or keep friendships. The few friends I have work and most have kids my eldest child’s age so have a bit more freedom. I thought when my eldest started school that would change because of pick up and drop offs but hardly anyone at his school waited around and the ones that did were in certain groups that made it feel like being back in high school.

Sounds like a lot of us are in the same boat. Years ago, when I began to work full time, I just didn’t have the time to catch up with friends, not as much time to have coffee and chats or visits. But than, I thought, it was always me reaching out for those visits, cuppas and chats. That stopped when I began fulltime work, oh well, I am happy with my life.

I feel like I could have written this myself – why is it so hard to make friends as we get older. I am not sure what the answer is to be honest as I am feeling the same. Every does have busy lives as mothers, as we know, but it makes it heart breaking when you feel like you’re the only one reaching out. Some times I think it comes down to finding the right friends – if you find the right ones then they should be reaching out the same amount right?!

I know what you are saying. I think its harder when kids are younger as life if busy (or was for me working full time, kids sports , play dates etc) and shift working partner but now that my kids are older I think its easier. There is more time to put into friendships – however I try to remember that we all relationships take effort and sometimes it will be you that has to put in, but it will even out at other times.

I learned a long time ago to make peace with myself, by myself. Sure I prefer to have friends around, but unfortunately I’ve not been someone else’s closest friend in years, I lost that when my best friend overdosed. I have quite a few friends who say they “are there” for you, but if/when you actually need them, they’re actually not. So I’ve learned to do most things alone.