How is your daughter going now ?

Foster/adoptive children do often have attachment issues and struggles with emotion regulation. From what you share I understand she has already some professional help. I would request more help when things are not improving. This could be with OT specialised in emotion regulation or sensory gym, psychologist focusing on mindfulness, etc
My 10yr old has a reactive attachment disorder and sees psychologist pediatrician psychiatrist and I’ve now NDIS funding so will seek OT specialised in emotion regulation as well out for her. We also have funding for support worker 15 hours a week.

I agree with no physical punishment, I don’t think that’s necessary for any kids. If you’ve been doing what you’re doing for an extended period of time and things are still not where you want them to be. I would be considering a visit to your GP. They are always a good source of information

Just hoping all is going well with you and your daughter.

Wow, it seams as if you are doing an extraordinary job in a difficult circumstance. Would you look in to biomed? They test for mineral/vitamin/hormone imbalances and treat with supplements to balance the brain chemistry.

I would speak to a doctor and tell him about your daughter’s sudden and unprovoked mood swings. She may have to undergo some tests to see if there is something else going on physically.

Your daughter obviously has other issues, but I have to say I can see a lot of me in her behaviour. It was just teenage bitchface stuff,mi grew out of it, but caused a lot of grief for mum and dad in the mean time

I agree with a lot of other comments, try a new therapist. It can take a few goes to find one the kid can gel with and feels comfortable opening up to. If one-on-one does seem to be working you could also look into family therapy sessions, so that there’s less pressure on her but she is still participating.
I also really recommend trying to find a hobby (sport, craft, instrument, etc) that she is interested in – help her to channel her feelings into something positive. The same goes for volunteering her time for a cause she’s interested in, such as at an animal shelter.

You have the two things most important to a teen, the money and control of transport. Use the power!

It is quite common for teenage girls to lash out as they come to terms with the changes they endure from growing from a girl to a woman.
Patience is key. Be supportive & understanding but firm. There must be boundaries.
Because of previous problems I would say this girl really does need counselling from a qualified counsellor, but you can’t force her to, she will just clam up again.
It’s going to be a long road & its going to get a lot worse before it gets better.
Medication is an option, but it could just make her worse. Most medications have side effects that may or may not affect your daughter. There’s also no guarantee that she will take the medication.
Sit her down & explain that things are getting to far out of hand & you’re considering taking her to a doctor to see about medication. That alone may be enough to scare her straight. Explain that you love her & only want what’s best for her. Meet her halfway. She’s going to want independence but needs to understand she is still a child & needs rules & structure.
I hope for a good outcome.
Best of luck.

all children go through these stages

My daughter had same issues at 15. Counselling wasn’t working. We considered medication. Then one of her friends spoke up and we found out our daughter had been raped. Finally, an answer, a reason, for her behaviour! Good news on one hand, devastating on the other. She eventually realised she needed to talk to someone and organised her own counselling. Nothing we did worked because she wasn’t ready. She’s now studying nursing, has a boyfriend in the Navy and is loving life. Maybe your daughter can’t be helped until she decides she can be, worked for ours

Unfortunately all teenage girls seem to have attitude problems, however yours are a little more complex, usually we say that they grow out of them and we just try and deal with the day to day issues as best we can, but as you have obviously been proactive taking courses and trying to deal with the issues and the private therapy has not worked I would be looking at taking her to a Psychiatrist and maybe some form of medication, it may be that she has some chemical imbalance and maybe simple depression that is causing her to not be able to respond, I have 2 sons who caused and still do cause heaps of grief and we went through thousands of dollars of therapy, and huge amounts of stress, once they actually got to a specialist who prescribed a small anti depressant they actually became more animated, they started to communicate and then we got somewhere, It cant hurt if you have tried everything else sometimes medication can help the process. And we need to remember that the brain is an organ no different to a heart, kidney, liver etc, and it needs to be able to function, and sometimes it needs medication for a time to allow this to happen. good luck

Try and find a therapist that works with the family to help you all cope. Also maybe a check up her the Family Gp to make sure all her hormones are in order

I would suggest seeing a GP but also searching for a therapist she is comfortable with to talk to.

i would see what your doctor thinks, he/she may have seen this before

You could help her to learn some self management techniques for when she feels like she is about to get angry and loose control, these can be as simple as breathing exercise to visualization techniques. Encourage her to keep a journal and express her feelings in there any way she wants poems, drawings, scrapbooking etc, and keep a close eye on her diet and exercise, stay away from too many processed sugars and carbohydrates and if possible try and find her a sport or exercise that she can participate in, make it something she will find rewarding and if its a team sport even better. And lastly dont be too quick to dismiss medications, Kids in Austraila are sorely over medicated but in the right situation they can make a world of difference, particularly at this very sensitive age, its a shame kids have to complete high school during their teens, we should all be allowed to party from 14 -19 then finish school and find a job! lol!

we have changed therapist 3 times in 12 months and finally found one that works for our family as its not just her that needs help but the whole family together needs to make changes good luck

I’d probably suggest for her to see another therapist. But it’s excellent that she trusts you so much and you can help her control her anger at times. It is sad that her past experiences have affected her so much. Some people have found certain activities/interests that help them express feelings they can’t explain in words. Eg painting, playing an instrument, dancing etc.

If she was my daughter I think I would be going to see another therapist it seems she never really had a connection with the last one.
Maybe her behaviour is a cry for help and you really should be taking her to see the doctor.
Good luck hope things work out for you all.