Hello!

I am currently struggling with when is the right time to send my son to school. He is 4 and will be 5 next January. He has an amazing vocabulary, wants to write, etc however is scared in groups and socially a little reserved. They suggest boys start school later, but I fear he will be bored if I keep him at home. So I need help to know what a key thugs to look out for and what are the experience of members. Thank you


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  • I sent my daughter when she was 4 she turned 5 in the June that year and I regret sending her at such a young age


  • We don’t get an option do we? The government decides on the school age start and we just send our kids


  • I don’t think you gave a choice. Legally, you are required to send your children to,school as soon as they hit a certain age. He sounds prepared and like he needs to go to,school to get the social thing happening for him


  • Maybe consult your paediatrician or go to a psychologist and ask some questions. They would know key things to look out for and/or be able to help with the social side of things


  • Does he currently go to kindie or has he been to any other prep classes? Sounds like he needs a little more confidence on the social side of things. Last thing you want to do would be to push him into school and cause him to retreat more with his social confidence.


  • Great advice from SHAY! Here in Tassie, if our children are 4 by January 1st of a year they can start Kindergarten that year. My oldest 2 were 4.5 when they started 3 days a week of kindergarten and it was a good fit for them. My youngest starts next year and will be 4.8 We have 1 hour a week in the year before starting kindergarten where the children get to go to school with parents to get a feel for it. If they offer something similar, try it and you will se how he interacts with others and also be able to discuss your concerns with staff.


  • It is a hard choice to make for sure. I am a prep/foundation teacher and I see this every day. The fact that you are already questioning it should be a sign. Though without seeing him or working with him I couldn’t give you a definitive answer. The biggest mistake parents make is they are academically ready lets send them to school. While this may be true social and maturity also come into it as well. As you have said he doesn’t like groups and if placed in school to early even though he is ready academically he may struggle and find it hard to cope at school due to his apprehensiveness which can lead to behavioural problems. It is only wise to send when they are socially ready. Academics is something they will pick up well.
    If you don’t mind me asking which state you are in? I am in Melbourne and would be happy to help if you are close by! Otherwise my advice would be go and speak to the teachers at the school you are thinking of sending him to. If they are a great school they will listen and give you honest advice. I know my colleagues and I do this all the time.
    If you would like to chat further feel free.


  • Has he been going to pre school? Ask the teachers for their view.


  • It’s difficult to tell as all states are different. My son started Kindy this year and he will be 5 in September. He is very articulate but took a little to settle in now loves it and has made new friends.


  • Did he go to kindergarter? Was wondering if he coped with that?
    I’m sure sending him to school will be a good thing, but I would voice your concerns with the school first. Is there smaller schools in your area


  • i think that mixing at school might help.


  • I would still take your son to the come and see days at the school you have choosen, and see how he feels after attending a couple of them. my son was a selective mute and i had the same worry even though he was september baby. Well lets just say sending him was the best thing we ever did for the. The school knew of his issue and not to push him to speak in a large group. Lets just say within a few weeks he fitted right in and had overcame his not wanting to talk, although he was still very shy. One year on and he is one of the group and joins in all activites.


  • I would chat to the school you are planning on sending him and see what their advice and also policy is. Perhaps he could do a trial day or morning with them to see how he goes and interacts with the group and also so the teacher can see if he is ready.


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