Hello!

My son starts secondary school this year and the closer the start date gets, the more anxious I am becoming. He is very excited and not concerned at all and am concerned that my anxiety is going to make him concerned. How have other parents coped?


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  • This thread is from 2014, i wonder how the kid and mum ended up going?


  • It is normal to be anxious , but if you show it, it will make him nervous . If you talk to other parents and perhaps talk to the school and find out how things work, you may feel more at ease. My kids were quite excited to be “out ” of the house , so it is important to encourage them to be a bit more independent and that they look forward to learn new things, more exursions , sports etc…


  • He’s coping ok so I suggest you keep your anxiety to yourself. Let him go and enjoy his school years


  • It is part of growing up. Go with the flow and do not pass on your anxiety to him.


  • It sounds like he’ll be fine and i hope you feel better soon


  • there are some good comments here


  • My daughter is also starting this year.. and is very chilled. Definitely don’t let him pick up on your anxiety if you can help it. Make sure you run through your expectations especially if he is now travelling or coming home by himself. Trust that you have given him the skills that will make high school a breeze.


  • Trust your son, give him support and not worry to much.


  • I agree – a manageable level of anxiety is natural. Trust your son. He has probably already had transition at HS and is looking forward to new challenges so try your best to support him. He’ll be fine :)


  • It is natural to feel a little anxious, but don’t get over worked, try to get busy with other things to take your mind off it more.


  • If he is not concerned then this is a good sign that he is ready for it! Don’t stress Mum… Your boy will let you know if he is not coping.


  • To the kids it’s just another day at school. They see their friends and forget about Mum until they get home and tell you all about their new classes. Make a date with your girl friends and go have a coffee or a movie and lunch as a celebration of their new start into High School. Nothing to worry about!!


  • Have a vodka and relax, try not to let him know you are worried, as this might make him worry when 99% of the time you have nothing to worry about.


  • relax and go with the flow. as parents we often can see the “bigger picture” in situations and are aware of all the things that cold go wrong…you say he is excited to start secondary school, so be excited with him, if he picks up on your anxiety then he will become anxious too and then there is a whole other box of worms you will have to deal with. Just keep your lines of communication open with him, introduce yourself to the school chaplain or guidance counsellor and discuss any issues you have with them, they can keep you in the loop on the quiet without your son knowing and it may allay your fears when he blossoms in the new environment. Good luck xx


  • Don’t fret, you have a lot of good support from other mums who have been in this situation before, All will be fine


  • I agree, try and not to worry about it, they all start secondary school one day just make the most of it


  • It is something they are going to have to do anyway, so no point in worrying.


  • Try not to worry too much. As a mum who has had two kids at secondary school, one has just finished and will b starting uni this year, and one who will be in yr 11, I’ve learnt kids are more ready for their milestones than we are. Keep your lines of communication open, go to all information nights etc and always go to parent teacher interviews. That way you will be in touch and know what’s going on. Also, most importantly your son will be making new friends. Make sure you get to know them by inviting them over and asking the parents in for a coffee when they pick up. The most important thing is to know who his friends are, if there are good kids your son will be fine, if not step in and keep your eyes open. Good luck I’m sure he will make the transition just fine.


  • So feel for you, mine will start in 2 years and I am also have anxiety. At least with primary school you can visit and interact but High School that is totally different..Good luck let us know how it goes would love some help preparing myself..Dont forget to Breath…sorry I wasnt any help…


  • Hide your own feelings, and remember -every other pareant of every pther yr 7 is going to be feeling the same way! If you know some of the parents already, maybe organise a bbq or something before achool starts. If you see him playing with the other kids, you might not be so nervous!


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