Oh sweetheart, I’m so sorry you’ve been going through this. It sounds incredibly tough, and honestly, it’s completely understandable that you needed to take a step back for your own mental health. It’s really hard when family dynamics get complicated, especially during such a vulnerable time like pregnancy and the early days with your baby. You deserve to feel supported and respected, and it sounds like she was doing the opposite.

Feeling guilty is normal, but remember that you’re putting your well-being and your baby’s well-being first, and that’s what matters most. It’s okay to protect your space and your peace, especially if someone is making you feel bad about yourself. If you feel comfortable, maybe in the future, there could be a way to set boundaries with her that allows for some communication without all the negativity. But for now, focusing on you and your family is so important. You’re doing great!

Your emotional health is worth more than this relationship, so don’t push yourself.
-Let go of the need for approval from your mother-in-law.
-Develop a strong social support system outside of your family.
-Don’t buy into your mother-in-law’s idea of who you are.
-Set Realistic Expectations.
-Practice Self-Care.
-Don’t Fall for the “Victim Card”
-Try Not to Take it Personally.
-Practice Self-Compassion.
-Set Boundaries With Her.

No, you’re not wrong, you need to put yourself first for your sake and for your little one. Although no contact isn’t really a great long term solution. I hope you’re getting close to resolving this

This is hard because it’s your partner’s mother but I read somewhere that if you dread talking to someone and have to walk on eggshells with them then STOP talking to them. It’s in your best interest. She sounds like a really nasty person, she sounds like a narcissist and the best thing you can do against them is ignore them. Don’t worry what she tells everyone else. They probably feel the same as you. You just look after you.

You are not the A-hole! You have tried to have the conversation with her on numerous occasions but she still does it. That is on her for not respecting your boundaries. Its hard not to feel guilty but as you said yourself, your mental health is much better for doing so. A mumma can’t pour from an empty cup, look after yourself x

Harsh on both sides. Family’s are always tricky to get the balance right

You’re absolutely not in the wrong. She sounds like a very toxic person and not great for your child to be around either. It’s sad that she’s acting this way, however, your partner needs to be supportive of you too and not take sides in this. It sounds like taking a break might be a good thing and give her time to think about how her actions might affect others. If you don’t do anything and keep putting up with the abuse, it will keep happening.

Oh god in laws can be terrible and I know from personal experience myself. You do what you need to for your own peace and well being. Your partner should also be backing you up but can feel like he is in the middle. Do what you need to keep away, people like that will never change and always make things about them. You and bub comes first p.s formula is great I did for my little one and get is healthy. Fed is best!

No, as hard as it is, you need to put your mental health first

You have every right to put yourself first. It’s hard not to feel guilty but protecting yourself is protecting your kids too. If she’s willing to change in the future you can revisit but no-one deserves to feel bad especially when you have just had a baby.

I think you made the right decision.

I agree that since it is his family, the partner should step in and step up and make clear that this way of treating his wife is not okay and if they want to remain contact with them they will have to change their attitude

Aw bless, that must have been very hard. I can totally understand you went for no contact.

Always do what is best for your mental health and wellbeing and put health and wellbeing first; it is a priority to to care for your health and wellbeing in every way. My babies were a combination of breast fed and then due to circumstances formula fed and they thrived and survived; fed is best. A partner always needs to step in and step up and resolve issues with family. It is not unreasonable to expect and get unconditional support.

Your husband needs to step in and tell your mother-in-law that her behaviour isn’t okay. You have to be his priority. You and your baby are his family now. It amazes me that he is allowing this.

Your husband needs to step up and sort the situation out. Sounds awful, I hope you get it resolved and can move past this.

I agree that your husband needs to step up and try to talk to your mother in law.
I had to take a step back from my mother in law for my mental health at one point and my husband took my children to see her without me until I felt I could cope with it.

She might be horrible, but you can’t do that unless your partner agrees. If he does, all good.
On a side note, she is right about formula whether you like it or not. Formula fed babies are 50% more likely to die of SUDI. There is no way personal feelings or ‘rights to chose’ can distort this.

At this point you have a husband problem. It’s his mum doing the damage, his extended family that she’s alienating. He needs to stand up to his mum and stop making you the bad guy.
It’s hard to not feel guilty, but you’re doing it for your own sanity and mental health. I’ve had to cut family out for similar reasons. When seeing their number calling your phone makes you cry and panic, you need to back away.

Look, your husband needs to step up and put his mother in her place. What you have explained is horrid to how she is talking about you and honestly, your parenting decisions are YOURs (you and your husband) and she has no say. Do not feel guilty OP, you need to do what makes you comfortable as parents and definitely put you and your family first.