Hello!

My 15yr old son has start to not wanting to attend family holidays and family outings.
I have asked him for input as to what he may like to do to encourage him and do things he also likes. I have even let him bring friends on family outings.
Would love some help to try and get him more engaged with the family.


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  • I would love to hear an update on how you got on with him and if he started to want to be part of things and it was just a phase.
    i have all girls and do know that my eldest did go through a phase where she wasnt really that interested in family things and prefered beign with her friends


  • It’s so hard to get some teams interested in family trips and activities. I think letting him bring a friend along is a good idea, asking him if he’d like to go anywhere is all you can really do. Some teens get like this for a bit and then normalise again once they are a bit older. Give it time x


  • It’s such a tricky time. Keep involving them and do the things you usually do as a family. As my kids got older they told me I was lame for some of our family traditions but once they got over that stage really appreciate it. Hang in there!


  • Unfortunately a lot of teens go through a stage of finding parents a bit lame and would prefer to do their own thing. It’s a phase that hopefully won’t last for long.


  • I think its the teenager age when they are not so keen on being with family.


  • Take them remotely camping where technology doesn’t exist and everybody is made to find enjoyment in each other’s company


  • You are doing the right thing, trying to engage him and involve him in the choices. Maybe have the outings shorter and he attends every second one as a compromise?


  • He is a teen and they get embarrassed of the parents for some reason but the more you push him to join yous he wont because parents are just embarrassing


  • He just needs time to himself so he can grow up, but somethings are not negotiable and a family holiday is one of those things. If he doesn’t go with you, he will resent that he missed out later on when the rest of you are talking about what fun you had. once you are away there will be things he will join in with and others he might spend at the hotel on his own. Tread carefully as you don’t want to alienate him from the rest of the family either. Good luck.


  • I think this is normal for teens they just want to do their own thing and be independent


  • I think just let him be him. Teens will think it’s not cool to hang out with their families but they will eventually grow out of it.
    I think if you try and force things too much they can really shut off sometimes so giving him a bit of space to do his own thing might help give him the independence he seeks.


  • There’s a time in everyone’s teens where family are lame. We all hope it won’t be the same with our own kids but it likely will be. Also being seen with your family is cringe.

    Besides asking your child what activity they’d like to participate in or what you could join them that’s fun for all or suggesting family orientated ideas I don’t know what else you could do

    I will always promote geocaching. There is always something for everyone with geocaching. It involves exploring the outdoors (so fresh air and exercise), there’s a screen involved, there’s team work, adventures to be had, puzzles and whatnot, it’s just the best


  • Find activities that he would like to do and take turns doing his preferred activity and yours.


  • Hes at the age where it’s normal to pull away from family, and start doing his own thing with friends.


  • We are in the midst of thus stage as well. We are balancing it with giving them space to do their own things, giving options to attend for some activities and making others non negotiable. Those times are fun as well though (not just visiting NaN!) – hotpot dinner or Korean BBQ things that require participation. Good luck!


  • It’s a hard stage and there’s not a lot you can do. He’ll eventually get over it and want to get involved in things.
    Unless there’s something deeper, but most likely just being a teen!


  • I think it is just a difficult stage, as they are learning who they are and learning independence. I would consider giving him the option to not attend a holiday if he prefers, but ensure he is still in the loop with decisions and when everyone gets back form the holiday. It may make him feel he is his own person and that family interaction isn’t something that’s forced on him. I wouldn’t bring the friends along, I think that’s the wrong message.


  • You’ve done the things that I would have suggested. I think more communication. Perhaps ask why and let him off some so he feels listened to.


  • This is completely normal. Maybe try other ways of engaging him. Perhaps family board games, movie nights, cooking pizzas together. Sometimes a shorter period of time is easier than a whole day etc. Go for the quality over quantity :)


  • Sounds like you’ve already tried all the things I would’ve suggested. Teen years are tough though, being with your family is seen as ‘not cool’ and your son is starting to develop his independence.


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