It has taken me a LONG time, but with three young boys- we have had to start saying ‘no’ to people when it came to doing activities like dinners and holidays and playdates etc. It was becoming incredibly overwhelming. You want to be a social family, but you also dont want burnout. We were just feeling so much pressure and rush, we needed to strip back and focus on our family unit and priority activities for a while. Then we slowly introduced being a bit more social again. We now know our limits, what works, and what we dont want. We have had to learn that saying no to someone is absolutely fine as you cant do everything.

It has taken me a LONG time, but with three young boys- we have had to start saying ‘no’ to people when it came to doing activities like dinners and holidays and playdates etc. It was becoming incredibly overwhelming. You want to be a social family, but you also dont want burnout. We were just feeling so much pressure and rush, we needed to strip back and focus on our family unit and priority activities for a while. Then we slowly introduced being a bit more social again. We now know our limits, what works, and what we dont want. We have had to learn that saying no to someone is absolutely fine as you cant do everything.

You need to do what is right for you and if you have a routine, which you can work out over time, it really will just fall into place. Most of those things mentioned above are important. My routine is get up early to exercise before work, walk the dogs with the kids (quality time) do chores at night for 1 hour only, that leaves a little time to watch a show with my children or play a game, I usually have half an hour to watch something of my own before bed. I read for a little bit before I get a full 8 hours.
Healthy eating is also important and I plan my meals accordingly.

I hear you – so much pressure to ‘do it all’! To be the best Mum and Dad you must look after yourselves as well. My hubby worked from home so we made a deal that for one hour a day we each looked after our self by either taking a walk or go have a coffee or go for a drive and see a friend and catchup. Time to just be our self. The kids never knew we had this routine as they never felt left out as we also did things like take a walk with the kids in the pram on a one on one basis. Breaks are so important to us humans and running on empty does no one any good. I use to walk to the local parkland take a book and read under a tree and sometimes just sit and watch the sky and think out nothing really just enjoying the quite. This is a practice I still do. I look forward to me time quit often and I just make it happen no matter what is happening in our lives sometimes you just need that hour to reset your harmony.

We can experience a lot of pressure indeed from expectations we put on ourselves or expectations others have from you. It’s good to set priorities and question yourself if you have to or if you want to do these things. There are the more important things we have to do and it can be very freeing to let go of things that aren’t that important or to become more flexible.

I totally agree with you. The pressure is huge, but the important thing is to work out what is most important to you and your individual family. For my family, sport was important to my children and our family, and financially work was essential, so I had to accept that sometimes meals were not as healthy as they could have been, or that the house could have been cleaner.

Firstly, I love the comment of getting the whole family involved in weekly planning. How fabulous to have so much input and get the kids feeling some control and organisation.
Meal planning on a Sunday night/Monday morning helps me. I work out what I can put more effort into for daycare days and what can be easy on the more busy days. My toddlers out of home activities are a routine and scattered through the week, and I get the bulk of the cleaning done when he’s at daycare and what I can get done on other days. Weekends are when we do fun activities as a whole family. We now eat all meals together so once little guy is in bed it’s relax time for hubs and I. Will this be thrown into chaos when our second arrives later this year, yes!!

Along with my comments below; writing down lists is really helpful. It is a good exercise for everyone in a family to write down a list of what is important to them and what is their top priorities. We have lists for must do priorities, personal priorities and wish list priorities.

We’ve made it a regular thing in our family to sit down together and figure out weekly meal plans (the older kids also cook) and what’s really worth spending our time, energy, and money on. It’s become one of my favourite parts of family life.
It’s been amazing watching the kids open up about what they actually want to do and where their real passions and hobbies lie. Some of the things they’ve shared have genuinely surprised me in the best way!
These chats have also brought us closer as a family. Everyone gets a voice, and the kids can feel that their opinions truly matter and that they play an important role in how our family runs. It’s given them a real sense of belonging and value.
On top of that, they’re starting to understand the real value of money — how you earn it, how you make thoughtful choices about spending it, and why saving actually matters. I love seeing them grow in that area.

The best way I have found to alleviate pressure is to get organised and to know what is key for a family; is to prioritise. It is always essential to prioritise everything that is needed with running a household and managing a family and also ensuring plenty of essential time for self care and well being.

I completely agree, I think we put so much pressure on ourselves to be this perfect person that its taking a toll on our mental health. I just try focus on what’s important and needs to be done in my immediate family and go from there. I try delegate my husband cooking at least twice a week, We take it in turns picking up our eldest from his part time job. Im a list making so I make lists of meals, what needs to be done and then break it down into doable portions. I also work split shifts part time so do chores in between shifts but I also make sure I take a lunch break so i have a moments peace and quiet.