When my son first started kinder he was great and was happy for me to leave, however lately when I’m about to leave he starts crying and doesn’t want me to go. Any tips on what I can do to help him not cry when I leave? It breaks my heart!

Want more real mum questions sent to you?

You'll need to check this email to complete your signup.
  • If this is something new then try and work out why this is happening.
    Talking to the staff at the center might help.
    Also if your child is crying its best just to drop and run. Let the staff know this is how you will handle it. Only stay and play for a while if the child is not acting up as by staying it just prolongs the drama

  • Have you talked to the educators? My son used to do this, and stopped approximately two minutes after I was out of earshot. He was just playing me!

  • I’m yet to experience this but from what I’ve heard apparently the best thing is to just leave, the kids end up settling themselves pretty quick!

  • Loving the answers on here, my daughter starts next year so it’s so helpful!

  • I work as a Educator in Kinder & I can assure you that once you leave, with minutes your son will most likely stop crying and go on with his day. I have found the less time parents spend trying to settle them in the better. Give him a kiss & a cuddle, tell him you will be back at the end of kinder to pick him up. An Educator should then step in & help by picking up your son & allowing you to leave. Sometimes we help settle them by waving goodbye at the window or distracting them with something that interests them. If we ever have a child that doesn’t settle we always call the parent rather than let them cry all day. You can also call the kinder after about half hour to get your own reassurance that he has settled & if is happily playing or not.

  • My advice is to take your child in to Kinder, let the Teacher know he is there, give him a hug and let him know when you will pick him up then leave.
    He will cry, but they usually settle very quickly.
    Good luck.

  • Just want to thank you all for your comments! My son has made a friend at kinder now and really enjoys going. No more crying when I leave. Yay!

  • The best thing to do is rip the bandaid off- walk him in and then once you can see that he is with a teacher/classmates, go straight away. Don’t draw it out, if goodbyes are a problem, just slip away unnoticed. My boy was a little whingey when he was in day care and I found it best to ignore the crying and leave. By the time he got to school he wasn’t worried about me leaving at all.

  • Very interested in these comments. My grandson is 5 1/2 and been in childcare since he was 5 months old. Right now, his mum is having a hard time at drop off as he’s decided to cry and beg to go home. Heartbreaking to the Max :,(

  • My son was the same. I spoke to his teacher and she informed me that he was fine as soon as I’d left too. I found that if I dropped him off about 15 minutes earlier I was able to stay there until he found a friend to play with and then he was happy for me to leave. Hope you find something that works for you and your boy too.

  • I would speak to the kinder teacher. My son used to do this but then was happy minutes after I’d leaft. Seek advice from the teacher. She will know what’s going on or can observe and provide guidance.

  • Do you maybe think your son is being bullied in someway Because you said at first he was happy for you to go . Now it’s changed maybe speak to your son or his kinder teacher

  • I spent years in childcare centres and I can tell you that most kids stop crying within 5 mins of their parents going some sooner, most teachers and staff at schools and centres would tell you the same, I’ve got special needs daughters and they used to cry too but I know they stopped after I left cause I volunteered and I could hear in the office if they kept going lol I think every parent feels bad but your kids are ok ???? just make sure your kids teacher and school is one you feel comfortable going to with any issues.

  • This happened to me today! It kind of always happens after the weekend or after a family trip as I guess she bonds with us and doesn’t want to let us go! No tips here sorry, I just try to be strong as eventually it passes :) though I completely understand your pain :(

  • My child used to cry a lot at kindy and i would feel so bad leaving them. Talk to the teachers and make sure they are settling down soon after you leave.

  • As many have Said so far it could be a change of carer. Or have you recently lost a loved one. We had this happen when our son was 4 we lost his Nanna and then after that he would always think when we left we were never coming back. We sat down and found the daycare were not handling it very well at the time as he wanted to talk about it but they tried to ignore it. We ended up moving and it was the best thing for him.
    Try and sit down and talk about it let them know its safe to talk about and maybe you will get to the bottom of it.
    Good luck xx

  • This has been my sons at daycare too! It started when their favourite educator left. Do you know if this is the case for your child too? It’s always heartbreaking when they are sad.

  • See if there is a reason why and maybe give him something he can keep to remember you aren’t far away

  • Check if something has changed to make him upset. Also talk to the kinder they can usually help.

  • It’s really hard when they go through this, maybe talk to him and reassure him you will be back to pick him up. Ask if you can run through an activity with him and then when the activity is finished you’re going to leave, tell him you will be back once the last activity of the day finishes (talk with the kindy teachers to find out the last routine of the day is). You can also ring and check in to see how he goes once you have left, most of the time they are fine within a few minutes, it’s just the initial shock of you going. Good luck!

Post your reply

To post a review please join us or login so we can allocate your points.

↥ Back to top

Thanks For Your Star Rating!

Would you like to add a written rating or just a star rating?

Write A Rating Just A Star Rating