Hello!

Would be interested to see if anyone is in the same boat – I have a loving beautiful 2 and a half year old boy who turns aggressive towards kids he doesn’t know out in public but is an angel at home. It’s starting to get embarrassing and upsetting that I have to constantly take him home every time he bullies another child, and am copping abuse off mothers even though I run to defend the other child involved every time! And remove mine from the situation. He has grown up playing with his older cousins and ‘pretend fighting’ but now he seems to think this is ok to do with other kids. He has been bullied a lot himself at play centres and I would sympathise with the mothers, but now he has turned into a non sharing bully himself. We have tried so many different ways to get through to him, how wrong this is and that no one will want to be friends if he keeps doing it but he doesn’t understand. He is extremely over active also. Do I take him to a doctor or someone who can help me out? as I’ve tried everything and am now getting anxiety before leaving the house. As I said he is beautiful at home, always giving lots of cuddles, ‘I love you’s’ and is very caring. I’m sick of him being looked at like a devil as he really is a lovely child at home and with people he knows. He also goes to playgroup twice a week for interaction with children and is usually ok there. Please help.

Posted by Lisa, 24/06/2013

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  • Maybe a slight case of anxiety?


  • teach him to communicate! it can be very frustrating for children because while we know our kids and their cues extremely well, other little children do not. You have to encourage him to say what he is feeling and be watching so that you can guide his interaction with other children (i am sure that you are but i just have to add this part for others to read). I think that he is fine with his cousins, but other stranger’s children might also have never interacted with other children too much. Don’t feel bad or embarrassed. Encourage his positive interaction. People should have more understanding with children who are learning how to interact. Good luck and don’t stress


  • I hope everything worked out for you! Sounds daunting!


  • Sometimes its as small as a change in environment. I know that we are having issues with my son at school although he’s older but the psychology said what’s different at school than home i said well he’s in compeition with others here and although he’s no possessive as he has a sister and knows how to share he’s still worried that he will miss out and there’s panic of noise and other factors. Also at home we don’t make him do his school work LOL. ALthough he does other jobs they are part of the routine so he just gets on with it. If you are really concerned you do need to chat to someone about it – even if it’s just the terrible twos at least you can talk ideas.


  • may it be becuase he doesnt know how to share. ?


  • hope it got better at the end


  • maybe he is just excited to see new people but doesnt know the right way to show?


  • Hope it’s all going better for u both


  • there is no need to be so anxious about this as most two yr old boys go through this stage especially if he has older siblings or cousins in the picture try not to worry to much and I have found that the naughty chair or the thinking chair is a great tool in this situation as it gives your child a bit of time to watch how the other kids are interacting and it also lets them know that the baviour that they are showing towards the other kids is not acceptable and if these other mums are giving you the stink eye they are obviously lying to you and themselves about thier own kids cause they all have their good and bad days .


  • Try asking the health nurse as they might have some strategies


  • my daughter can be the same sometimes


  • Hope you found the answer you were looking for.


  • Some kids a like that, I really hope it stops soon


  • I hope you found some useful answers


  • Yeah, mine are usually good when they are out and naughty at home.


  • I find this really odd, because it is the opposite for my son-he saves his naughty for home.


  • If he grew up play fighting maybe he thinks that’s what u do to make friends?


  • If it continues talk to your doctor


  • Rach has lots of good info there, I hope things are going better for you and your little boy isn’t so aggressive anymore.


  • Best of luck :D


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