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13 Answers

I’m feeling like I’ve lost myself. I feel disconnected from my friends and feel like I am useless at work. Did anyone else feel like this? How did you get out of this funk?


Posted anonymously, 3rd September 2019


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  • I think everyone feels like this but eventually you get some normality back


  • This time is so precious and less and it should be spent with your baby, kids and husband. I can understand that sometimes we as mom feel disconnected or so out of every fun but its alright try to ask for help from your mum or family member and you can go see a friend or catch up on something. Enjoy your time with baby this time will fly and you will miss it so much.


  • You aren’t alone and it gets easier.
    Find something you are interested in.
    Sometimes if we feel anxious we can catastrophize situations and find negitivity as part of tge fight/flight response.

    If you have been feeling like this for more than a couple of weeks, maube chat with your GP.
    I found walking, connecting with community and journalling helpful.
    Journalling allows me to reflect on why I am feeling and reacting to certain situations to resplve troggers.

    All the best


  • If you live in an area where there is plenty of houses can you go for a walk with your baby in a stroller. If there is people outside near the street you can casually say hello. You may be able to have conversations with some even if it is only brief. it will at least get you out of the house and hopefully you won’t feel so isolated. I realise the weather may not be suitable for you do that some days. You may be able to go to a playground and watch older children playing. Their parents may be with them. When your little one is old enough you can use a baby swing. Mums will often talk to others while watching their children. I have noticed that when I take a relative’s little ones to a playground.


  • You are not alone. Try to join playgroups -great way for children to play and make a friends and you have a chance to meet other mums and chat


  • Yep, give yourself me time to feel like your old self.


  • This is not uncommon at all.. try to create a strong support system around you and allow yourself sone ‘me’ time and date nights with your partner or girlfriends!


  • Becoming a mum is a life changing thing which can impact the feelings about yourself, your partner, work & -relationships, your friends and just in general life. Take time to adjust and be sweet to yourself. Your feelings are normal, not strange


  • Yes, I am an older mum and when I had my son most of my friends had grown up kids, I was feeling very lost. I took myself out every day for a walk to a cafe and treated myself to lunch most days or just a coffee and a snack, I even breastfed in the cafe (discreetly of course). I found I met a lot of people to talk to who talked to me because of my baby, and it helped me overcome my loneliness. I also took myself to the internet cafe (days before I owned my own computer) and my son slept on the floor under the computer while I learned all I could with the help of the supervisor there, he is now coding computers lol. Also went to the library for story time each week.
    So don’t sit at home, make a new routine, get out where you can, time will fly so quickly and before you know it your child will be in kinder and you can then work again.
    Sorry just realized you said you are already working, so maybe you need a change of jobs too.


  • Part time work actually helped me. Time some me time to think


  • It didn’t happen to me, but it seems like a common problem. With a small baby in particular, there is little time for yourself. And that would help your mind a lot. Ask for help so that you can go out sometimes. Even just a walk in the park by yourself can help. Take care of yourself. Things will go better. :-)


  • Understand that when you become a mother your life changes forever, in saying that though, find your new funk.
    Make sure you are still making time for self care and to do the things that are important to you.


  • is it possible ind that one friend that u can share your thoughts with and vent to about everything. sometimes a good vent can help. if you feel useless at work, could you maybe ask your boss for extra duties so you can feel more challenged at work?
    Is there a book you can curl up and read to help you escape to a another world?
    sorry if this doesn’t help.


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