41 Answers

I’m moving into a new unit with my daughter and I’m a little worried that I will have trouble settling her into our new home. It’s just the two of us and we have been living with my parents since she was born (2.5 year). She also doesn’t like change and has separation anxiety. Any advice?

Posted by Gabbie, 13th July 2014

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  • Try to take some familiar things and surround them with them

  • Make sure she has a pretty room and make a fuss about her special place!

  • At that age hopefully you can make it an adventure, let her help you decorate and make her own special space

  • How did things end up going?

  • There are lots of great ideas about how to support your daughter settling in by getting her involved. I’d like to add that she will be watching you and your parents closely and if you seem stressed, anxious or worried… she will more likely be stressed or anxious. If you can be happy, calm and balanced about the move … and a little excited … not too much as that can make a sensitive child anxious.
    Calm mum and grand parents will be very supportive for your daughter. Best wishes with the move

  • She will get used to it!

  • We moved last year with a 2 (almost 3) year old and a 5 year old (kindergarten) after Term 1. The only advice that I can give is let your daughter know what you are doing and keep her informed of the change, talk to her about positive things with the move and if possible let her see the new premises before actually moving in so she can visualise her new surroundings. We didn’t have any problems thankfully with moving so I hope yours goes smoothly too. Good luck.

  • Try and keep things as familiar add possible. Don’t have big change in decor etc until your baby has adjusted to the new surroundings. In my experience, it takes no time at all!

  • We visited the new area we were moving to a few times before actually moving into the house. We showed our son the nearby parks and beach and where his new daycare would be. I think it certainly helped him with the transition. He also got to help set up his new room the way he wanted it.

  • I found the best way to settle a toddler into a new home was to make a huge fuss of their newRroom. Show them how their favourite teddy/toy wants to go to bed already. Keep linen the same for a while even though it is tempting to invest in a new look for the new home.

  • I didn’t really do anything too big to be honest, the only thing I did do was bring my son in for a few hours before his bedtime and I showed him what/where all the rooms were like he was a visitor so he’d know where everything was and how close/far away his room was from mine and I refreshed his memory about where everything was in the morning
    morning, and so he could play and get a little comfortable in the house instead of just throwing him into the house and have to put him straight down in a strange environment. I don’t know if my son adjusted well because I done that or because it didn’t bother him that he was in a new place but he was completely fine in the house.

  • How informative!!!

  • Take her to see the new unit (if possible) before moving. Show her what will be her room, and make a big deal of it/get her excited about it.
    Once you have moved, set up her room as soon as possible, so she can see she still has all her precious things.
    If possible, have one or both of your parents there on moving day so she can see them and they can reinforce “this is your new room” “this is your new house” “your new room is very special” and they can play in her room together with her toys. Make sure when it comes time for them to go, she has the chance to say “bye” with a kiss/cuddle.
    If she cries for them throughout the evening, gently reinforce that they are at their house and this is her new house. They love her very much and will see/talk to her very soon. And that you will be staying there with her.
    This new set up may take a while for her to get used to, but hopefully it all goes well for you. :)

  • If your parents visit, and later aren’t going to want to come as often it may be a good idea for them to gradually reduce the length of their visits so that your child doesn’t fret for them as much or at all. Hopefully that way will reduce the risk of separation anxiety. Even moving just yourself can be stressful and unsettling for a short time even if there is no other family involvement prior to the move. In some ways night lights are a good idea – temporarily. There has been many reports about constant use of nightlights not being good for a child’s eyes.

  • Make sure she has lots of favourite things around her in the new home.
    Make sure your parents are there a lot in the beginning to help with the transition.
    Let her make choices of things for her room, ie don’t ask a 2 yo to decorate but you can give her a choice of 2 items like curtains etc. Do you like these pink or this purple? Giving her a limited choice still makes her feel empowered and that should help make it her room and make her feel included and her space.

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